Drop My Straw

It gets better, vivint, Facebook....

2011-06-05T10:20:00.003-06:00

Vivint is giving away $1,250,000 to the top charities nominated by us! Let's get some money to the It Gets Better Project!!!

1. Go onto facebook and Like 'Vivint'.
2. Go to http://www.vivint.com/givesbackproject
3. Click on Pacific region and click on It Gets Better Project
4. Click on Endorse button on bottom of page.

Click on this link:

Hello, Mr. DJ

2010-10-24T10:59:00.003-06:00

"Pardon me, can you tell me how to get to the Soviet Emmmmmbasy?"

Terry Jones, the Koran, and Freedom of Speech

2010-10-01T14:56:00.000-06:00

On Wednesday, September 8^th, US President Barack Obama, in a speech to the white house press corps, asserted his hope for Florida Pastor Terry Jones would reconsider his planned stunt of burning a Koran to protest 9/11. The President argued that what Mr. Jones was planning to do stood against everything the US stands for and that he would be putting service men and women abroad in danger. Mr. Jones ended up relenting, and did not burn any Korans on September 11^th, presumably because of the president’s gesture, but also because he was told (falsely) that a planned mosque would not be built near the 9/11 attack site in New York. There has been plenty of heated debate concerning whether or not this individual in Florida should have be allowed to protest in a way he saw fit, how soldiers are effected by discussions at home and abroad, and what our responsibilities as US citizens are. It is a sticky topic because while most people want to insure the freedom to speak our minds, we also want to declare our thoughts on the insane pastor’s concept of protest. The two are intertwined, and separating the two is tricky business. Here we go!

Ignoring the inane law of polluting by unlawfully burning paper (this was brought up as the legal reason Mr. Jones and his congregation shouldn’t burn the books), there are no laws that prevent anyone from burning any book as a sign of protest. Protesting is protected speech and so long as the protest isn’t obscene, seditious, or the direct, legal equivalent of physical action (IE screaming “Fire!” in a crowded theater) it is the right of any US citizen to speak on any subject they want. And while this freedom exists, it does not give people free license slander or create libelous speech (again, this falls under speech-as-action). Not every person in the country agrees with everything that is said, and for a good reasons. Democrats protest against bills that enable large corporations to pollute, and republican protest, well, about pretty much everything.

Other people protesting and speaking freely are Neo-Nazis staging marches, Baptist congregations shouting slurs at the funerals of homosexual soldiers, and the pastors of tiny, southern churches burning the Koran. The thought, according to Thomas Jefferson, is democracy is a conversation and can only function when differing sides are informed. People being kept from speaking because their opinions are the minority results in many disenfranchised citizens looking to take more dramatic steps to make themselves heard. 99% of American citizens (myself included) would think the idea of burning a Koran despicable and completely out-of-touch with anything that could even remotely be considered a positive act of protest. It could be held up as a good example of something that would be universally agreed to by the population at large. However, 1 in 4 Americans think that President Barack Obama (a practicing protestant Christian) is a Muslim. So, maybe I am on the wrong side of history, and when these people write the history books they may call this pastor a hero and Obama a Muslim. Maybe if these people keep repeating the lie to themselves, it will be remembered as fact. Who knows? And that’s the point. While it’s despicable to lie and make demonstrably false statements, it’s better for them to be vetting in public and be open to debate rather than being hushed and allowed to fester.

What is fundamentally against American ideals (as established in the Enlightenment principles of the constitution) is when citizens are not only not being allowed to express their opinions, but a forced to endure a President reminding them that they shouldn’t speak their mind out of fear of what others may think or do as a response. That’s the whole point behind the right of freedom of speech! A person can speak their mind without fear being killed for doing so. This begs the larger question of whether US citizens are allowed to behave in ways that are not only legal but strongly encouraged by our founders because enemies of the state threaten them with death.

And here I was thinking the role of the military is to defend American rights from others who would seek to undermine them through terror, intimidation, and acts of violence. US soldiers should not to be used to guilt US citizens into remaining quiet less they end up with blood on their hands. Sadly, this response really makes this insane pastor’s point: These people are so radical, that burning a book will insight them to violence, so don’t do it!

Many authors have commented on the fact that religious discussions are immune from public debate. If two coworkers disagree about the outcome of a sporting event or the results of a political race, it is culturally acceptable to discus, debate, and argue their individual point of view. However, when it comes to comparing aspects of different religions or their practices, a debater is treated as anathema. People who express belief in religious ideas are given a pass to instant credibility simply by virtue of holding these beliefs, beliefs that are immune from criticism. If a person is an active Muslim extremist who believes women to be chattel and followers of other religions should be executed, we hold that ideal in the silly realm of moral relativism and hand wave away criticisms by saying, “Oh that’s just their culture. It isn’t good or bad, it’s just different. Who are we to tell them how to behave?” So, when an arguably crazy pastor in Florida tells his congregation of fifty (!) that he will be burning the Koran to protest against the extremists who have a public agenda to take down this country, and to attack Muslims in general, it is not his fault that there will likely be protests and innocent deaths as a reaction.

He is well within his right as a full citizen of the United States to burn the Koran, the Bible, Whinny the Pooh, or the latest copy of People Magazine if he so chooses. The result of that would be many reasonably-minded Americans thinking (rightly) that he is a lunatic and other, less reasonably-minded people (whipped up into a frenzy by religious clerics and state-run news outlets) will likely riot and issue death threats. The responses of both groups of people are things that happen regardless if the person speaking has the foresight to anticipate it. In September of 2005 Danish cartoonist Kurt Westergaard published a cartoon depicting the prophet Mohammed with a bomb on his head. Up to that point, various other artists, writers, and performers had created similar, and in many arguable cases, more sacrilegious representations of the prophet Mohammed. The fact that this particular cartoon was the one piece of art chosen to be the focus of pent-up anti-Western sentiment wasn’t the fault of the author, the publisher, or the guy down the street. It is the fault of a fanatical movement that thinks a fair and reasonable response to burning a book or printing a cartoon is the death of the speaker and riots that result in several deaths of innocent bystanders. It may be the case that there is something fundamentally wrong with a reaction that cannot be brushed away with the blanket excuse of moral and cultural relativism. The reason there aren’t tens of thousands of US citizens calling for the head of this pastor or hundreds of dead bystanders, trampled to death in riots is the direct result of the right to speak to one’s mind. And while it is legal for the pastor to expound his own particular brand of hatred and intolerance it is also legal for everyone else in the country to call him out on it with words, not actions.

If these freedoms were to extend into some of the theocratic states such as Afghanistan and Iran, where their holy books establish a law that is, by definition, unassailable and absolutely correct, the radical fringe would not be allowed to make threats on the life of anyone who disagrees or cricisizes their political or religious stance. While death threats are a form of speech, they are not protected, as they act as direct incitements to violence. These people could rant and scream and protest their hatred of the man, his ideas, his congregation, and his penchant for grotesque blue blazers all day. They could scream it from the tops of minarets, on street corners, on web sites, or television broadcasts. Supporters of the pastor could rant and scream right back at them, saying such a reaction proves their point, and is hypocritical when one considers certain ideals of peace and tolerance upon which a handful of Islamic principles are based. The hope is somewhere in that discussion, there is something approaching the truth and a nominal state of peace. If it is allowed to be discovered through discussion (screaming, in this case) and not shut down by the Imam, President, or Cleric, there is at least a chance of it taking hold and changing the minds of the people.

Wrapping up the day....

2010-08-17T21:10:00.003-06:00

Working interview went well this morning. I hope I get the job! I really don't know how to read it so I guess this is on hold until next time.

Enid is going out with me on a run tomorrow morning...she just doesn't know it yet! She is doing well on a leash and she seems to enjoy the runs so far.

Took Nikki (and Enid) for a short walk tonight. She was bouncing her back end a little on the way back but seems to be resting well right now.

Matt and I started the Insanity workouts on Sunday. We did the first workout on Monday, but decided to rest it out today as his body is quite sore. We will pick it up tomorrow! I will post pics as we progress on down the program.

Still trying to make new friends....we are branching out to meetup groups. We are for sure going to a meetup in a couple of Saturdays for appetizers, wine, and discussions on what to do the next couple of months. I am also going to pick up a book for a book club meetup and we might check out a couple of the hiking meetups! I am so excited to do new things and meet new people! It is way past due since we totally got dissed when we were back in Michigan this last time. I told so many people that we were coming into town and it looks like Mandy Boes and Dan Walsh are the only friends who cared to hang out with us outside of our parent's annual 4th of July party. I was kind of expecting it, but it still hurt. This gives me more fuel to find friends in Denver!!

Happy Friday the 13th!!!

2010-08-13T15:09:00.002-06:00

My interview went well this morning. I now have a working interview scheduled for Tuesday and 8am. I hope that goes well and they offer me a position....and real soon!

I also applied for a position at Denver Dumb Friends League. Again, this is a part-time position, but at this point I will take whatever I can get. I want to get started working with animals and learning new techniques. Making some money is also an incentive!

We are off to bowling tonight with a few friends. I suspect it will be a great time! Tomorrow we are setting up to brew a new batch of beer - an Oberon look-a-like...we will see how that goes. Sunday is our big night at the Hi-Dive. There our eyes will partake in all sort of debauchery acts...or so we have been told. Super Happy Funtime Burlesque show hits Denver......a review (of sorts) to come later.

Let the fun begin....Cheers!

It's been a long time....

2010-08-12T11:07:00.004-06:00

I haven't posted in a long, long time and thought today would be good to start again. Since I wrote last I have done a lot including:

A great internship at Alameda East where I learned a ton and met some great people.
Graduated from Bel-rea Institute of Animal Technology on June 7, 2010
Returned to Michigan for a month long excursion....restful and relaxing!
Passed my VTNE on July 24, 2010! Yay, I'm a Certified Veterinary Technician

Now I am on the search to find my first Vet tech job. I am excited as I have an interview tomorrow! I will update after I get back home.

Tiny Enid is no longer that tiny. I took her to the Vet last week and she is 47lbs and in great health. She may become my running dog. I took her out on a little run yesterday and she did great and appeared to enjoy it....we'll see!

Nikki is doing well. She has had a few seizures in the past couple of weeks, luckily they have only been small ones. I will need to take her into the Vet soon to see about her incontinence and back pain.

Ocyrus and Athena are doing great! They are coming up on 10yrs in September.

Matt has been here the past couple of weeks and I have really enjoyed him being around. I know that in the near future he will be on the road again, but I'm cherishing the time I have with him while I can!

More to come...and a lot sooner than the last time!

What a day!

2010-02-10T16:14:00.003-07:00

This day has run the gambit and has kept me on my toes.

It started off with me waking up and being totally exhausted which changed my plans of going to the gym. I am still trying to get over this bacteria thing and don't want to risk it.
I went to school and found out I didn't do so great on my first mini CPE.
Later on in the afternoon I took a Clin Chem test and think I probably did bad.
I got out to my car and found that I got a parking ticket.

Sheesh!!!! It can only look up from here....and it did!

Everything was made right when I got home and checked my email. I received an invitation to intern at Alameda East, my first choice! I am so excited they have so many great areas to that hospital. They have a MRI for goodness sakes! I will be doing rotations in all areas some of which are General Practice, Lab, Pharmacy, Dentistry, Internal Medicine, Emergency, Physical Therapy, Surgery.... I will be getting information on what I do and when a couple weeks before I begin and I will update at that point.

I can't wait to start!!!

No excuse, I'm just lazy....

2010-02-06T15:09:00.003-07:00

Ok, the title isn't exactly true of my character, just of me updating the blog. Here I go....

It is now 2010, which I still cannot believe. This is going to be such a momentous year I think I may implode.

My Dad will be turning 60! I hope the 'ole man can still ride his Harley after that birthday (j/k, love you Dad!).
Matt and I will be celebrating our 5 year wedding anniversary in June....we have forgotten to celebrated it each year up to this so this is our chance to make it right!
What we usually remember to celebrate is the day that we started dating, November 1. This year will be 10 yrs since we made it "official".
Our lovely kitties are going to be 10 yrs old in October.
The biggest event of this year will happen in June when I graduate from Bel-rea Institute with an Associate of Applied Science Degree in Veterinary Technology! I have never finished a college degree before this, so yeah, this is kinda a big deal! :)

Whew! There is a lot coming up ahead. I want to say that I will update this thing more often but in the words of Sanjay (Apu's brother) "I promise nothing."

It is my duty..

2009-10-14T14:36:00.007-06:00

...to be called for jury... duty.

Thank you, thank you. I'll be here all week. Don't forget to tip your waiters.

NOTE: This is a boring recap of my experiences as a juror. It's pretty much for my own records (as the squishy, gray-matter version in my head does a shit job of remembering the details of these things...), but you're welcome to read through. I'll try to make it as interesting as being a juror can be.

c. April, 2009
I received a summons to report for Jury Duty. "It's your duty!" It says. I sigh and punch my dog in the slats, as I am wont to do when frustrated.

I respectfully postponed my service on the date it provided not out of a sense of anarchic or hatred for the government, but because I was due to be in Texas, installing a full-dome theater system on the same day. I was also, kindly, asked by my employer to postpone it, for the same reason. They aquiesced, saying, "You can only postpone once. Please provide a date you absolutly cannot postpone. It must be within 6 months.

I put in the date furthest out as that was where my calendar showed the least amount of activity.

c. September, 2009

Another summons appears in my mailbox. I had hoped they had someone forgotten about me.

This summons helpfully informed me, "This is the date you will appear at the jury commissioner's office. Since you've postponed your service once, don't even fucking think about not showing up. We'll, like, totally put a bench warrent out for your arrest, you asshole." I decided not to call their bluff.

I inform my employer I will not be able to work on the day I appear. I also remind them that they have to pay me for the first 3 days. HA! It is likely, I tell them, I will be cut from the list as they call many more than actually serve and I know of no one who has actually sat on a trial.

They reply with much of the same as before, "Why don't you postpone? You're needed elsewhere in the world!" I refer them to the above blog post and they remember, yes, that had I already postponed and to not show would result in being tossed in the pokey. (I love "pokey" as a synonym for "jail")

October 13th, 2009

6:20AM
Mandy wakes my up by sicking the dogs on me in bed.

I wake, wondering why this is happening. Then it comes to me: Oh yes. Today I have to get up at 6:30, to drive her to class, return home, shower, and head off to the court house. I do this.

8:20AM
They jury commission does not provide parking for the would-be jurors. They do, helpfully, discount our parking if we park in a lot that is several block away. I park in this lot and walk to the court house.

I pass the security (coat through scanner, wanded, frisked, asked to lift pant-legs (I assume to determine if I wore tasteful socks this morning)).

I proceed to the fourth floor of the building where I join something like 300 other would-be jurors. We watch a horrible video explaining that the man in the video is proud of us and we should grin and bare this itrusion into our busy schedules. Something about patriotism.

9:10AM
A womans voice on the PA says, "I will begin calling names for the courtrooms. We move fast, so shut up and pay attention." She actually said, "Shut up and pay attention." I laughed out loud and slapped the guy next to me on the shoulder.

My name third called out of the room of 300. 1:100 odds against.

9:30AM

We are marched to a courtroom and told to sit in the jurors box. Sidelong glances are thrown at the dude in the cuffs seated at the defense table. There are many more people than would actually sit on a trial. This confuses me, so I eat a small handful of the peanuts I keep in my coat for just such an occasion. I wonder why the number is so large. Usually, the number of jurors ranges from 3 - 12 depending on the nature of the case (criminal, federal, civil, corporate, etc). Hey! I've seen a few minutes of Law & Order once!

9:35AM

A bald, young judge enters and tells us each to stand and give some information about ourselves. We do this. He dismissed a few of the would-be jurors on basic disqualifications (one, literally, could not speak English beyond saying, "No... no eng... no eng... no.") Another was a retired cop, etc, etc.

Each time a juror was dismissed, another person from the overflow group would take their seat. This continued, in kind, until everyone had said their lot.

We entered a phase called voir dire (French: to say the truth). This is where the prosocutor (representing the State) and the defense (representing the person being tried) ask the jurors questions. Anything and everything they want. People have to answer honestly, under threat of perjuring (another way to go to jail in this process as everything we say is said in Open Court, so a matter of the court record and is a form of testomony... or something).

As people said things like, "I hate cops." and "No, I can't look past any biases I have." They were dismissed with the thanks of the court.

The defense guy, a smarmy bloke with no neck asked me, "How would you rate the legal system."

"I would give it a D-minus."

"Oh? Why"

"Because of prisons overflowing with people, the overwhelming majority of which are minorities and are there because of small drug convictions. Mandatory drug sentencing. A horrible appeals process. Prisons-for-profit..." He cut me off here, thanking me.

I did (and do) believe what I said and assumed saying it would go in favor of getting me released.

As time went on, more and more people were released and I kept staying where I was: In the juror's box. I am continually surprised by how candid these people are. Public speaking is usually rated as the #1 fear most people have (death being 4th or 5th). I'm amazed at the eloquence and frankness of these random people. Feelings of pride rise. I eat more peanuts.

After the question-asking period, one-by-one, both sides dismiss people for no reason. These are called peremptory challenges. In this way, the prosecution and defense kept dismissing people until there were thirteen of us left. The thirteen that would site as jurors on the trail. (But only twelve sit on a grand jury, you think. Ah ha! It's a mystery to be solved at a later time).

We were given "Juror" badges to put on our shirts and told, in no uncertain terms, "You cannot speak about the details of the trial with anyone until it's over--not your fellow jurors, spouses, children, or friends. The people in this building will see your badges, which you are required to wear anytime you are in the courthouse, and will only speak to you as little as is necessary. The people related to this case will not make eye-contact with you, let alone speak to you. This to protect you from making decisions not based on the facts of the case and for them to avoid even the appearance of impropriety."

We jurors are told to convene in the juror's quarters (a small room at the back of the courthouse that (true) no one except the bailiff and us are allowed to enter at any time during the trial) and to push a button when we are all there.

11:45-12:30PM - Afternoon (lunch) Recess
The court goes on hold while everyone goes and gets lunch and tells their significant others that they, in fact, will not be getting out early as they have been selected. Much sighing.

12:30
We all gather in the juror's quarters. Someone pushes the button on the wall when we've all arrived. The balliff pops her head in and says, "Follow me and be sure to sit in the box, don't stand."

We walk into the room. Everyone is standing. We head to our box and sit. Then, and only then the bailiff says, "Please be seated." Everyone sits. We move into "Opening statements."

Immediately, the prosecutor (a lithe and intimidating woman from the district attorney's office) stands before us and launches into a dramatic description of the crime (a drug charge). She waves her arms around and speaks with inflection. She makes claims about evidence and burden of proof and blah blah blah.

The neckless defense guy does the same thing, except in reverse. This man has the unfortunate goal of defending a guy who doesn't really seem to want to be defended (more on this later).

Then the real trial opens. The prosecution has the burden of proof, so they go first.

She calls her first witness, an undercover cop...

More to follow.

Email update

2009-09-11T20:25:00.001-06:00

I am trying to update the blog by emaing it the entry. Hopefully this
works.

I am currently in a Macys Mens Store (I didn't know it existed either).

Hope this works.

-Matt Fox
system engineer
303.883.8339
(Sent from a mobile device)

Obama / McCain

2009-08-29T11:09:00.003-06:00

(Editor: Going back through old unposted drafts. To hell with the consequences. I found this post from right around the elections. I don't know why I didn't post it, other than being concerned about the feeling of others. AHHH HAHAHA! Silly, naive Matt.)

Original Draft: 11/5/2008
McCain's concession speech was great. I derived personal satisfaction from it not only because he lost the race, but that he spent the last eight months solidly attacking Obama only to say, on the night of his loss, that he, "...had the honor of calling Senator Barrack Obama to congratulate him." Considering the vitriol of his ads, equating Obama with terrorism, pointing out how unqualified he is, and that he'll essentially climb into everyone's home, night by night, and eat their children, shouldn't he have spent his last few minutes of national attention ranting and foaming at the mouth that we're going to hell? If he actually believed the tripe he has been spewing (and we've all had to endure) these past several months, why didn't he remind us, one last time, that Obama once served on the same committee as Ari Flitcher or that he is an "elitist"? Was that all just politicking or did he really hold the same opinions as his attack ads?

In the end, who cares? He lost.

Epilogue (9 months later)
Turns out I was right. Big surprise there. Considering the things that he is still saying about every policy the current administration, I think the acceptance speech was the one and only time he ever said anything positive about Obama, other than as a back-handed compliment or when they both agree on the same issue.

Ween - The Mollusk

2009-08-26T13:51:00.001-06:00

Hot was the summer of '02. Especially the end of June, leading to the 4th of July weekend. A party hadn't been planned, they never really were. Chad and I had bought some meat at Meijer and some beer at the International Beer Store (or IBS, the same acronym as Irritable Bowel Syndrome... no coincidence). We had a geek-gathering planned for the next day. People would show up, hook their computers together, and stink. Beer would be drunk, music would be played, and Kleiner-1-Niner would kill us over and over. The night before, we thought, let's get set up for the party. Invite some people over, grill, and drink some beer.

Mandy showed up sometime late-afternoon. We had vacuumed and cleaned the empty pizza-boxes off the floor. This equates to the closest thing to cleaning we did, and we were damn proud of ourselves. So proud, in fact, we felt we deserved a beer. Sitting on the back porch, Djarum in one hand, a beer in the other, we looked out over Scum Lake and pondered the meaning of it all.

The 4th of July is the central point of the summer, the great climax and the greatest expression of pure summer-abandon. College was in full-swing. I was living with three other guys in a run-down house, working full time at a well paying job, and dating my future wife. Our pet cat Jabba hadn't grow sour on our collective insanity, and would still occasionally pop in and nibble on our scraps. These were the glory days. A time that seemed to last forever, yet, in retrospect, was only a period of about eighteen months. Life's possibilities rolled out before all of us, and we knew, simply knew, that we had to reach out an grab them. The first year anniversary of 9/11 still hadn't happened, and we were all reeling in the changes wracking the world around us. It was a time of change on every level, and in the center of that maelstrom of chaos, insanity, and fun sat a simple, unassuming house.

Camelot.

Say the name to anyone who lived through that period, and they will inevitably do two things: Smile and shake their heads. Next, they will say, "Remember when...?" And will tell the story of Tyler almost blew himself up with a roman candle, or the time we had 20+ people on the phenomenally dangerous deck rocking it back forth to see if they could get it collapse, or the time two here-unnamed people went across Scum Lake with arm-fulls of Class B fireworks, lightening them off in a mall parking lot until the entire neighborhood was crawling with cops.

So, in many ways, that weekend was much like any other. People, both invited and not, began to arrive as the air cooled slightly. Somehow the grill was lit, a half keg appeared at one point, and music began to play through any number of the sound systems that filled every corner of the house. I would be playing groove salad in my room, where the pot-heads would inevitably crash on the king-sized water bed. Dan would play a scratchy vinyl record he found at a flee market called "28 Truckin' Classics". Chad would burn crazy mix CDs and put them in the various boombox-style CD players throughout the house. All of this would blend with the various conversations, laughter, and occasional breaking of something expensive-sounding.

That night, through cacophony of noise, I heard a few small bits of music that caught my ear. Somehow I associated the music with this skinny dude wandering around talking to Chad and friends. I said hi and he eagerly responded, "Hey! How're you?" I think I wondered off. This happens often at parties. You meet people you're supposed to know, but due to the excitement or drinking or something, you can't place them.

Mandy and I woke the next morning on the downstairs couch. Dan, even taller than me, was crumpled up on love-seat completely covered by a blanket. The sliding door was wide open, and outside I could see Scum Lake sparkling. Today was the LAN party. All of our careful preparation from the day before had been laid to waste by the party held to celebrate the preparation.

Mandy and I went upstairs. Chad was making eggs and toast. He made us some and we sat on the deck discussing the night before.

"Who was that skinny guy last night? He looked really familiar." I asked.

Mandy said, "That was Andy. You've met him, like, ten times."

Chad, "Yeah. Andy. I've known him for years."

Me, "Andy?"

Chad/Mandy, "Sigh..."

"Ah, right. Andy."

Chad, "Did you hear the CD he brought? It's really good."

"I think so. I caught a little of it."

Chad, "There's this one song, it's an instrumental. Mid-way through, it sounds like you."

"Sounds like me?"

"Yeah. It sounds like you, groaning."

"Ahhh... what?"

"Here. Listen to the album."

I couldn't immediatly tell whether the band was suppossed to be humorous, dark, rock, or folk. I found myself laughing, kind of, and looking around to see if anyone was seeing me enjoy it. The experience was akin to listening to Zappa for the first time. You keep asking yourself, "Am I suppossed to be laughing at this?"

The key to Ween lies with the understanding that there isn't anything to get. The confusion, the humor, and strangeness is the point. Once I stopped trying to disect it and just listen and enjoy, I fell in love. A deep, musical love I've only felt with three or four bands. Experiencing Ween, obviously, is difficult to sum up in words. It's very challenging music, but the reward more than compensates for the effort.

If you haven't listened to Ween, or you've only heard the one or two singles that used to be played endlessly on MTV ('Push the Lil Dasies" or "Voodoo Lady") go out and buy / download The Mullusk and listen to it. Try not to figure it out. Turn off your brain and let them take you down the brown road, where mutilated lips, whales with pokadot tails, drunken Irishmen scream about cracking in your head. It's worth it.

Getting it all done

2009-08-24T20:20:00.001-06:00

(Editor's Note: This was written before Matt left on a two week business trip, so the day ranges, etc, are not accurate.)

Over the past few days, we have made incredible progress solving (and creating) little puzzles around the new homestead. Solving these little problems is the greatest emotional reward I have experienced as a humble homeowners thus far. The process combines thinking in new and exiting ways, listening to people who know more than you, and doing enough research to not solve yourself into a corner.

As part of their yearly Harley Davidson US circuit, Mandy's parents have come out for a two-week visit to rest and relax. Of course, by rest and relax, I mean working 8 - 10 hours per day helping us get our shit in order.

Over the past seven days, we have accomplished the following items (this list is not exhaustive):

1. Purchase and plants several flowers and grasses
2. Plan out the backyard patio, dog run, privacy and chain link fences
3. Extend sewer vent to roof
4. Clean gutters
5. Repair gutters
6. Replace or repair swamp cooler parts (descale interior, paint and seal basin and siding, install new media (evaporative stuffing), replace drive belt / axle / bearings, clean pump, install new filter basket
7. Paint clock face
8. Flatten flower bed
9. Lay new bricks for walkway
10. Repair lawn mower
11. Purchase "little giant" ladder system
12. Repair buckled bead board in basement and staircase
13. Install 4 in-ceiling speakers, 2 RCA breakout plates, 1 8-connector speaker cables breakout box
14. Install 3 new electrical plugs, three lighting fixtures, new circuit breaker in box
15. Install bathroom vent fan and ductwork
16. Repair shower swinging door water sweep
17. Hang curtains
18. Laid concrete (150sq/ft(
19. Built two gates, a privacy fence, and 30 foot chainlink fence
20. Poured in 4 tons of pea gravel
21. Built shelter for lawn mower, more bricking
22+. Many other items I am missing

Back in November, we put up two posts as a walk through of the home in it's viginal state. Now that we've sacked, razed, and rebuilt pretty much everything, we've created another quick walkthrough that shows some of the changes. Enjoy!

2008 - Top Ten

2009-08-21T12:31:00.004-06:00

I finally finished my collection of the top ten songs created in 2008. It is almost the 4th quarter of 2009, I know, but I enjoy ~~making~~ finishing these collection for the same reason I occasionally update this blog: To act as a kind of diary. Placeholders are important when looking back on events passed. Without these bookmarks, the years (music, stories, events) blur and become something difficult to parse, and since there is no working form of grep for the mind, I'll have to use these blogging and audio mastering tools to help collect and organize my history.

I'm not going to distribute this collection, except to people who ask for it. The year is long over and everyone (myself included) has moved on to new music. I'm definitely going to try to get the 2009 collection done by the December holiday season, so I can I can send it out and help spread my own personal form of holiday cheer to friends and enemies alike.

For those are interested (but not interested enough to ask for a mix), here are the songs in no particular order.

(Artist | Album | Track)

(Ok... so there are 11 songs... it was a good year!)

Here's the introduction to the mix for your listening pleasure (no video).

A mile high

2009-08-19T18:45:00.008-06:00

I am finally back in Denver after what seemed like the longest trip of my 2-year stint with Global. This install is overwhelmingly complex, making problems both fun to solve and mind-shatteringly annoying. At least the video chain isn't as complicated as some other installs (CAS), so it doesn't require a person starting over from the beginning with every single issue. I think the difference with this system, as opposed to the more common setups, is how wide the breadth of ad-ons are. There are so many different ways to use the system that we (and even the client) have no idea where to begin. This makes troubleshooting a bitch. A bitch with iron stiletto shoes trampling the balls of truth, or something.

The other unbelievably taxing aspect of this particular site is its being situated in central Texas. Next to an Army base. In August. To paraphrase Matt Daemon in "Syriana" describing the heat in the Arabian desert as akin to walking into a physical wall. It's an object you slam into. It is that hot. So, everywhere I walked, everyplace I entered, my body experienced the switch from 100+ (80% humidity) to dry, 70 degree A/C. If the heat is like running into a wall, the A/C was like having my lungs tore from my chest and dry-cleaned. The simple act of experiencing these temperature changes, really exhausted me. I felt perpetually out-of-sorts because of it.

Now that I am back in Denver (for a few days), I am really looking forward to coolish evenings and the simple joy of going to sleep before 2AM after working 14 hour shifts.

"I pay two hundred dollar for this!"

I am sea-sick sailor on a ship of noise, got my masts all backwards and my instincts poised, in a truth-blow gutter full of wasted years like blown-out speakers ringing in my ears... -Beck Hansen

Facebook Status Arguments

2009-08-04T14:59:00.002-06:00

What is the deal with getting in arguments about people's status messages on Facebook? I've chanced to see someone post, "Prez obama sucks!" receive thirty+ responses. These responses range from, "right on" to "I don't think you have considered all of the facts when making such an odious and ill-informed statement, sir." In either case, they are still responding to what amounts to a grammatically-terrifying drunken shout in a bar. I don't think it these statements (if one can be so generous to call them that) need to be debated, because there is nothing inherently debatable about them.

It seems, at first glance, there would be better forums for this type of rancorous debate, but maybe not. I think what confuses me most about the debates, or "firestorms" these statements evoke is how people, who one would assume know each other (it is Facebook, after all) can seemingly get away with the things they say that would normally require a good boot to the head if said in the real world.

People have often argued the reason people are such assholes online, and not in physical interactions with other humans is due to the perceived sense of anonymity. This kind of reasoning isn't without flaws (IE if people think they are in any way anonymous online, not only are they naive, but a good case could be made that they must suffer from some form of brain damage) but the whole idea of Facebook is to remove anonymity. The goal is to let people know who you are so they can seek you out and communicate directly with you. So, how do they get away with calling their wives a bitch or blatently disrespecting friends and family without any consideration of the consequences? It's a strange phenomenon.

The Head

2009-08-03T13:11:00.000-06:00

(What have you done with her body?!?)

Like I need another reason for people to think I'm crazy....

2009-06-08T11:14:00.004-06:00

We have been looking for months for a new buddy for Nikki and last week I came across the cutest 5 month old puppy on Craigslist and I decided to pick it up. The crazy part comes in when people find out that it is a Dalmatian puppy!!!

And her name shall be Tiny Enid...

Matt got me listening to this crazy podcast called Hooting Yard. There was a story that I really enjoyed that revolved around this character named Tiny Enid, thus our new pups name. If you want to read the story you can check it out here.

Nikki and Enid are getting along fabulously. I will leave you with a short video of them playing.

Dogs Tug'n The War

2009-05-25T14:34:00.001-06:00

This was taken during the first week of moving in. At this time, we had agreed to doggy-sit a friend's dog while she was away for a family emergency. We were unpacking and dealing with a basement that would periodically fill with raw sewage. It was a stressful period. The dogs kept us sane.

The update...finally!

2009-05-16T10:21:00.002-06:00

So, there we were last week Wednesday, getting ready to go back to GR. Everything seemed well and good. I was studying for my 2 tests and and Matt was packing his bags. He was a little stressed because he had found out earlier that week that he was going to be in Texas for 2 weeks.

I get really tired after 10pm, so I decided to go to bed and wake up early and study. I got up just before 5am and started to study. After a half hour or so I decided to feed the "kids". I got the food out and Nikki and Athena came running...what? no Fat Guy for breakfast? That is odd. So, I went around the house looking for her thinking that she was in a closet somewhere sleeping. Low and behold Fat Guy was not in the house. After for searching for a good 15 minutes, I decided to wake Matt up to tell him the good news and to start searching outside. For those of you that don't know Fat Guy - Ocyrus - she is a fat blob of charm with no claws, skittish, and a lover - not a fighter baby!

I started stressing because I had not studied enough, nor packed enough as I will know later. We also had no time! Our schedule was set up as follows

7am - At school for 1st test
8am - At school for 2nd test
9:30am - Matt picks me up from school and we drive to the airport

We had no leeway to look for a cat and our friend Eric was house sitting for us but he wouldn't be over until after work. The search continued with Matt talking to neighbors and me looking close by. After looking for 40 minutes, and crying at this point, I heard this faint little cry from next door. I call her name and out she comes from the bushes! I take her inside and she immediately goes to the food bowl (obvi). I hug Matt and run out the door for my first test....the timing was really close as I got to school 5 min to 7am.

I took both my tests, we got on the plane, picked up the car in Chi-town (sat in said car in traffic for too long) and drove to GR. Hung out with Mom, Dad, Jess, Mike, and Dan and went to bed. Woke up the next day and found that I left most things, that I wanted for the run on Saturday, in Denver: my running rain jacket and my iPod. Well I was wanting to get a Nano for awhile....so no time like the present! We drove across GR to Woodland (only Mac store in town) and found out that they were closed for renovations until Saturday. Really?!?! Anyway the trip was not all for nothing as Matt picked up a great bag for a steal and we were able to eat at Sammy's!

Friday afternoon was prep for Saturday parties. Mom did most everything herself, with me and Jess helping here and there. Matt and Dad went to Best Buy to get the Nano - GREEN!!! - and then they went downtown and picked up all our race packets. What sweethearts!

Plans for sushi out were scrapped as most of us were feeling that we wanted to lay low. We were chillin on the deck when in comes Crazy Dre'! After the sun went down and sky became dark (luckily not many mosquitos yet) we were enjoying the night when in walks THE Amanda Boes!! I think at this point no one would be surprised if Superman or Megatron dropped by.

Anyhow, we had a great relaxing night and then up early the next morning for the River Bank run. Mom's 5k started at 7:30 and she was warming up by walking briskly towards the people that had already begun the race....we should have left a few minutes earlier to compensate for the yahoo's that didn't know how to do the parking thing. My 10K started at 8am dry, but about mile 2 it started to sprinkle. By the time I was nearing mile 3 it was a raining, not hard just consistent. It took me just over an hour to finish, so Mom was ready to go by the time we found each other as she had been waiting for awhile in the rain. We were soaked, but it was a great experience!

Matt, Jess, and Angie met up that morning and did the 5K walk and then went to breakfast. Matt will need to add a post to tell you about their adventures...

Mom and I went home and got the house ready for the birthday parties for Matt. Party one started at 2pm with the party two starting around 7pm. Both turned out very well. Many people came, food was eaten, stories were told, laughter abounded!

Jess made Matt a great album for Matt that everybody signed. There were some outrageous pics in it - some that I hadn't seen in a long time! Thanks again Jess, you did a great job!!

Sunday came way too soon. We figured out the travel arrangements (long story) and packed up. We really appreciate Mom and Dad for opening up their house to us, Dan for keeping us company and providing great steaks, from what I heard from the beef eaters :)
Thanks to Jess and Mike for keeping us entertained - always! And to all the rest of our friends and family thanks so much for coming and celebrating Matt's 30th birthday! We had a great time catching up and creating memories!

We were sad to go, but glad that we were able to come back and see everybody. Thanks everyone for making it a great trip!

Beethoven

2009-05-06T14:47:00.004-06:00

I can't help but think of "Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure" when I see the name 'Beethoven' written anywhere. Pronounced, of course, "Beeth" "Oven".

I've started getting into classical music again. I used to be a frequent listener of the classical music station in Grand Rapids. It was always first or second on my programmed radio stations. I've attended multiple symphonic performances over the years. I've even had some very famous collections given as gifts. Mandy and I donated money to the local classical station last year. Etc, etc, etc.

However, I never really got into it enough to recognize anything but the most famous pieces, though. And over time, I seem to have lost interest in seeking out a good classical music source and trying to discover pieces that really move me (as in "You gotta move it, move it!").

In an attempt to really get to know a couple of the most famous pieces by one of the most famous composer's in history, rather than download the entire discography (symphography?) of every major composer in history, I've only downloaded "Eroica" (Symphony No. 3) and "Pastoral" (Symphony No. 6). If I picked up more than these two selection, I think I would get lost and they would all end up blurring together. I'm hoping this hand-picked approach to reawakening my love for the form will help me get comfortable with one composer's style before I try another. The goal is to be able to hear the differences between the approach to the pieces so I can start to form a basis of opinion (like vs. dislikes) of various composers.

Wish me luck!

PS We're back in GR in 24 hours!

Playstion 3 and XBOX 360

2009-05-04T12:02:00.003-06:00

I own a playstation 3. I don't have enough time to dig into the more unknown titles, so I tend to stick with the triple A games that sell in the 5 million+ category. Grand Theft Auto, Fallout 3, etc. Because of the exclusive titles you can only get on one system, I've also been considering picking up a XBOX 360 to play the other half of the triple A games. Halo 3, Gears of War, Dead Rising, etc.

I think I'm going to hold off for a bit, even though the online portion of the experience in the PS3 is lacking, when compared to the XBOX 360. Also, what the hell is wrong with their marketing department?

I think they would probably sell more PS3's if they didn't design their ads to scare the hell out of people.

Oh it's been too long...

2009-04-22T11:09:00.002-06:00

I thought I would throw some thoughts up here since it's been a very long time since either of us has posted anything. I am currently working through my 3rd quarter at Bel-rea on my journey to become a Vet Tech. I am taking 20 credit hours which include Anatomy and Physiology 2, Sterile Techniques, Veterinary Science 2, and Parasitology. As if that was not enough to take up my time I have begun searching for a part-time job. More updates to come on this...

Nikki is doing pretty good. I am taking her into the Vet on Friday to run some radio graphs, get a cyst removed, get her a microchip, and have her teeth more closely examined. More updates to come after the appointment.

The cats are doing fabulous. I began schedule feeding them in late January/early February and both have lost weight! Ocyrus is always going to be "fat guy", she just is a little less fat. Athena on the other hand now looks like a normal cat with a waist and everything.

We moved in our new house about a month ago. Yes, we bought a house! My mom came out a week ago to help arrange and such. It is now starting to feel like ours and it wouldn't have been so if it wasn't for her help!

Matt is off carrousing the world - San Francisco, LA, Texas, NY, and possible South America soon! More on this to come also.

All in all, everything is well and busy.

Walkthrough 2

2009-03-09T13:06:00.003-06:00

Walk through part 2! Enjoy!

Truncated walk-through of our new house!

2009-03-09T00:11:00.005-06:00

This is Part 1 of the house walk-through.

Part 2!

Coming soon!

obama.

2009-03-06T11:32:00.004-07:00

"I read the news today, oh boy, about a lucky man who made the grade.
And though the news was rather sad, well I just had to laugh.
When I saw the photograph."

Hello Mr. DJ - III

2009-02-06T18:40:00.003-07:00

(Pardon me, but you can you direct me to the Soviet Em-m-m-m-mbasy?)

Photoshop as past:future connection

2009-01-29T12:05:00.004-07:00

Here is a link.

The link will lead you to an amazing collection of images this ~~Russian~~ Greek dude photoshopped of war scenes in St. Petersberg. His idea is to blend war and contemporary photographs together to show how connected history is to our current conditions--with specific emphasis on urban development. They are quite stark and impressive. Check it out!

Flash Classics: KAAAAN!!!

2009-01-16T10:36:00.004-07:00

Before reading, click here

The first time I ever surfed the internet with a compete navigator, GUI-based interface (NetScape Beta v0.03b) instead of the text-based Lynx system used by fellow ~~hackers~~ computer enthusiasts, I didn't really see what the fuss was about. Sure, rather than typing "ATT=LFx (where x is the tab index for the link)" you could click on links with you mouse. There were images, tables, and, occasionally, bad MIDI music that would auto-load, but, overall, meh...

Then a friend emailed me (EchoNet at the time, natch) the IP for KHAAAAN!!!. At the time, DNS servers were unreliable beasts, often routing you to incorrect sites or throwing a 404 page cannot be displayed error, so you had to actually memorize the IP address for the host computer. The page that appeared was this. An animated gif of Captain Kirk screaming, "Khaan!" from the Star Trek film, "The Wrath of Khan".

I was struck. How could someone spend these incredible resources building a page that is a two-image GIF animation with a looping audio file? Then it struck: They did because creation and distribution of web-based content is essentially free. Here I was, sitting on my 386 (40mhz) in my room watching this animation created by someone out there in the ether. Why? Because the animation has a worldwide audience.

The KHAAAN! page since become a web classic. One of the first examples of a bit of content "going viral." I still occasionally look it up and relive that life-changing "Ah HA!" moment I had so many years ago.

This is a graph put together by flashman relating how many 'A's people generally search for when they are trying to find this historic clip. The evolution of the web continues to amaze and befuddle.

John K: Great animator or greatest animator?

2009-01-15T10:10:00.000-07:00

Greatest.

New Zealand Nintendo Ad

2009-01-13T15:55:00.004-07:00

Not only is "scare-the-shit-out-of-little-kids" creepy, it also wracks your self-esteem by repeating how you cannot win the games and will be beaten. I'm not sure why this would make me want to fork over $300 istead driving to the local game store and beating someone up.

Real World: Realestate World

2009-01-12T12:50:00.003-07:00

"How do you like this place?" She asked, half-smiling.

"Eh..." I responded helpfully.

"It's big, I'll give it that." Mandy added.

"Yes, it's big. Maybe too big?"

"It's not that..."

"What is it?"

"Well, there sure are a lot baby shoes nailed to the wall." I offered.

"And all the surgical masks laying around." Mandy added.

"And an attic with a wet bar, toilet, shower, sink, and dishwasher in the same room."

"And the shower downstairs with three shower-heads on each side of the shower (making 6), one with a long neck, sticking halfway into the shower space, and the three shower heads on the top ceiling... making for 12 shower heads in one shower. With no lights inside..."

"The closing door is glass, I bet some light would get through." She tried, the smile almost totally gone.

"It doesn't help much if the interior of the shower is painted black."

"Ah, yes."

"I almost want to buy this place out of the sheer madness of it all. I could so be a crazy old man here." I said.

She laughed nervously and looked at Mandy for help.

"Ok, let's knock this one off the list." Mandy said and headed for the giant, 12-foot high door with the doorknob on the wrong side.

We've entered the world of real estate in a search for a home out here in the mountains, and if the above story is anything, it's true. This real estate world is a strange, quirky place where the laws of logic and reason have no authority. Our goal is to have the purchase wrapped up and be ready to move in by mid-Spring. I have no idea if this is possible, but I am having a hell of a good time just wandering through these houses of madness.

I expect the search for a home that is A) Cool B) Not going to break the bank is going to fraught with much peril, but I also think it will be entertaining to watch from afar. With that said, I am going to post a few entries about the crazy houses we see, put up pictures, and solicity for feedback. For those of you who've been through this process before, please give us tips and ideas. The more we know, the informed we can be when it comes to signing that dotted line.

Giving Thanks in Grand Rapids

2008-11-24T13:37:00.005-07:00

(Bush and Turkey. Turkey is happy. Bush is happy.)

We are off to Grand Rapids for our annual Thanksgiving visit to our old stomppin' grounds. Much eating and making of conversation is sure to be had. We are landing late afternoon on Wednesday the 26th and leaving on 30th mid afternoon. As much as we've tried, we've been unable to keep our schedule as open and flexible as we would have liked. If you're going to be in town and would like to hook up, give us a call or write us an email and we'll see if we can make our schedules cross yours.

We are going to be able to spend some quality time with the clan Forton, which is great, as we haven't been able to hang for an extended period in, well, years. Time seems to get away from us, especially living 18 hours driving distance (or spening $1,400 on airline tickets), and we never have enough time to spend with everyone as we'd like. Many people have taken us up on our offer to fly anyone out to visit (frequent-flier miles allowing). Mandy's parent's have visited twice, my Dad and Jan came out, Chad, Mandy, Jess and Mike, then Jess by herself, and Mandy's aunt, uncle, and cousins. It's good thing we invested in an apartment with a spare bedroom!

As much as we're geeked to be back in town, we are quite happy to not be there for Thanksgiving. It seems the holidays bring out the best and worst in people. Even with a conscious effort to avoid family drama this time around, it seems unavoidable. Maybe that is the problem; we spend so much time trying to avoid it, we lose sight of the fact that when you get all of the members of an extended family together, there is going to be some amount of friction, no matter what. I think my ability to disengage myself from the drama is hightened skill, but even with that I can't help but feel my blood pressure surge when I have to deal with people who are so stubbornly adicted to generating pointless drama.

As I said, it will be great to see everyone, but it will just as nice to not have to deal with the drama come Christmas.

Body Builders - Body Modification: Here it Comes!

2008-11-14T12:59:00.005-07:00

(Holy God Almighty: Click her muscles for an image gallery of these beauties)

Can anyone make a good argument for how this isn't the most extreme form of body modification? In my humble opinion, Tatoos and branding don't even come close to this.

On the other hand, being an adherent to the principles and doctrine of the transhumanist movement (if you could call it that) I openly welcome extreme body modification. It's not like the ability to remake yourself in increasingly bizarre and Kafkaesque ways will get more difficult with time. So, it's not really a matter of being able to stop it, it's more a matter of being a happy or unhappy person when it arrives and others want to do it.

We don't all live in a vacuum, remember? Most people don't think exactly like you because, well, they're not you.

(The future US President: c. 2050)

Hello, Mr. DJ? (Part III)

2008-10-13T11:03:00.004-06:00

Excuse me, can you direct me to Soviet Emmmmbasy?

Top Ten Flying Tips

2008-10-08T14:53:00.004-06:00

In one year, I have been on 81 flights. 81 times I’ve turned off my cell phone and waited as the plane rocketed into the sky. 81 times I’ve stowed my tray table and returned my seat to its full, upright position in preparation for landing. I’ve adjusted my watch 77 times for a new a time zone and been through 18 different airports in four countries on two continents

Shortest flight: 31 minutes (Chapel Hill, NC to Washington, DC)
Longest flight: 11 hrs 45 mins (Denver, CO to Amsterdam, The Netherlands)

Here are the top ten tips I can give people making a quick visit to Airworld. The tips are not listed in any particular order of importance or anything, nor are they complete. I’m bored on this flight to DC, so I thought I’d share…

Top Ten Flying Tips

1. Avoid checking your bags.

Most airlines charge for any checked bags. United, for example, charges $15 per check bag, per flight. That means, if you’re on a round-trip voyage to New York, you will end up paying $30 to check one bag.

Fill a suitcase that falls within the size requirements with your clothes and bathroom supplies, and pack a backpack with the rest. There’s still a useless ban on liquids in the US, so make sure to not bring any liquids over 3 ounces. The liquid containers you do bring have to be packed in a clear plastic bag that can easily be placed, separately, on the security conveyor belt. I assume the TSA put this ban in effect to determine if there are any teeny, tiny bombs suspended in the liquid. I’ve lost two bottles of expensive cologne and countless bottles of water, shampoo, and mouthwash because of this.

If your bags are in your keeping throughout the trip, the airlines can’t lose them and you don’t have to wait around for them to show up on the baggage claim. Trust me, you don’t want to be in a position where, after 20 hours of straight travel, you find yourself Oslo, Norway listening to the helpful attendant say, in broken English, “Matthew J. Fox, please go to the lost baggage claim counter.” This has happened to me and it sucks.

2. Put an empty water bottle in your carry-on backpack.

Due to the completely useless, misguided, and draconian ban on carry-on liquids, you cannot pass through the security checkpoint with a full bottle of water. Whether you’ve purchased the bottle in the airport (within viewing distance of a TSA agent or not, you’ll still have to pitch it). However, you can get an empty bottle through. The theory is: Empty bottles cannot contain sizable amount s of the airplane-blowing-up fluid “Blowiquid.” Safe!

Once on the other side of the check-point, fill up the bottle at a water fountain (be sure not to use the fountains labeled “Blowiquid” or you might just blow yourself up with your bottle of water). This will save you having to pay $3+ for a bottle in the DMZ. Plus, the low air pressure / high altitude on the flight will dehydrate you much faster than at sea level. If you want to be at all functional when you land, make sure to drink lots of water.

3. Sign up for the frequent flier, rental car, hotel programs

These programs are free and can only benefit you. Most give sizable bonuses simply for signing up. It often takes a while to build up enough miles for a free flight or for an upgrade, but most point systems take forever to expire, so you’ll eventually get something free.

4. There is no need to arrive at the airport overly early.

When I started traveling for business, I would find myself clearing security and sitting down at the gate with 2 hours to spare. Unless it’s a holiday, Monday morning or Friday evening, or you’re traveling internationally, arriving at the airport an hour and a half early is plenty of time. If you’re not checking a bag, and you’ve checked in online, you can easily get to your gate with up to 20 minutes to spare. If you are checking a bag, most airlines will stop allowing the checking of any bags if you try less than 45 minutes before the plane takes off—also, there’s a 50lbs limit on all carry-on bags. If you go over that, you incur even more charges. Keep it in mind.

5. Check in online.

After you purchase your ticket, you will receive a confirmation code (a six character alphanumeric number), make note of it. 24 hours prior to take-off, you can check in online with that confirmation code and your last name. Go to the airline’s web site and look for the online check in section. This will guarantee you seats, and, many times allow you to pick the best seats.

Most airlines oversell popular flights. This means, if you don’t check in online, there is a good chance you will get bumped to the next flight.

Also, if you don’t have a bag to check, you can bypass the ticketing counter entirely. Just head straight to security with your printed ticket. This makes the process much faster.

Also, while you’re online checking in, be sure to sign up for that’s airline’s flight status updates. These can either be emailed or sent via text message to your phone. It’s much more convenient to find out your flight has been canceled or delayed before you leave for the airport.

6. If you’re on a short flight (2-3 hours), get an aisle seat. If it’s a long flight (more than 3 hours) get a window seat. Avoid the seating letters B and E like the plague.

Aisle seats have their perks. They allow you to stretch out your legs. You don’t have to climb over anyone to get to the bathroom and you will be the first person out of the row when the plane lands. Sadly, it also means that every person who walks down the two foot wide aisle will bash you with their elbows, bags, heads, etc. On long flights, a window seat gives you something to learn your head against other than the seat, and no one will have to crawl over you to get to the aisle or to vomit (sadly, also, this has never happened… at least to me).

A quick sub-tip: If you’re going to sleep on the flight, make sure to buckle your belt on the outside of the blanket so that the damn flight attendants won’t come around and wake you up to make sure your seat-belt is on. They can see it on the top of the blanket a go bother someone else.

7. Airworld is mean. Be aggressive in everything or be prepared to be run over.

If you want to get on the plane with any hopes of having overhead space to place your bag(s), wedge your way to the front of the line. If someone is kicking the back of your seat, turn around and tell them to stop or get a flight attendant. If you’ve been directed to a security line that is really long, look for a shorter one and cut over to it. No one is going to spare you any unnecessary courtesy. Most are like me, who fly every week of the year and will take any advantage possible to get through the maze of lines and checkpoints faster. Most us aren’t going on vacation or having an adventure. We’re working and want to get through the system as fast as possible.

If you want a can of Coke and a cup of coffee and another bag of pretzels; ask for them. Flight attendants are trained 70% safety, 20% security, and 10% hospitality. They really don’t care how many complimentary bags of nuts they hand out. Just ask. If they say no, punch them. They love that.

8. If you are traveling for an emergency (funeral, health concern, etc), call the airline directly and ask them for their reduced emergency fare

When my grandma died this past year, she was to be buried less than 48 hours after dying. This kind of radically-quick burial, make it very difficult for people who live on the other side of country to get to the funeral home before the person is buried. As a result, the round trip, less-than-24-hour-notice tickets from Denver to Grand Rapids were nearly $1000.00 for the two of us. This isn’t a trivial amount of money. I ended up calling the airlines and asking if they had any specials for people who were traveling for funerals, etc. They confirmed that yes, there were. We had to provide them with the name of the mortuary and funeral director, complete with telephone number. In the end, however, we ended up getting the same tickets for $300.00 total; a significant drop. Keep it mind.

9. Book in advance, but not too far in advance.

If you can avoid traveling on Saturday and if you can purchase your ticket 2-3 weeks before the flight, your tickets will be significantly less. In addition, there is much more availability in seating. You should be able to avoid the dreaded B and E seats.

However, if you book a month or more earlier, there is a good chance the flight you want will be canceled or have its details changed. If you can avoid booking that far in advance, do it. If not, ask the reservationist if the flight is a daily commuter flight. If so, it should still be there when you try to take it.

10. If you need/want something, butter up the counter agent.

“Hey, I have a question for you.”

“Shoot.”

“How much would I have to pay you to get this plane to arrive early?

“Hahaha… you.”

“But seriously, I need anything other than a center seat. I’m sure a charming/intelligent/green person like yourself could do this for me.”

“Hhahaha… you. Here you go!”

And so forth. It’s amazing what these attendants can do, if willing. They have the power to change anyone’s seat, get you on a flight, and bump you up the standby line. It’s hardly ever what they can do. It’s always a matter of whether or not they want to. You have to make them want to.

They are supposed to use their powers to help people with a high standing in their frequent flier program (Premier, Premier Executive, 1K, Gold Alliance, etc) as they spend the most money with the airline, etc. However, I’ve gotten them to do things for me that they refused for the Gold Pass carrying curmudgeon in front of me because I said I feel sorry that they have to put up with those types of people. HAHAH!!! Bastard that I am. (see #7 again).

Curmudgeon: “I DEMAND that you get me on this flight!”
Attendant: “I’m sorry, sir. We’re completely booked.”
Curmudgeon: “Do you see this?” He shoves his Gold Pass in the dude’s face.
Attendant: “Yep. There it is. In my face.”
Curmudgeon: “This mean I can get you fired!!!”
Attendant: “I’m sorry, sir. We’re completel-“
Curmudgeon: “Nevermind!”
Me: “Damn. What an asshole.”
Attendant: “Can I help you sir?”
Me: “Are people with those cards always like that?”
Attendant: “Sometimes.”
Me: “It must take some amazing patience to deal with them.”
Attendant: “Sometimes.”
Me: “Look, I need to get on this flight, but I heard what you said to that guy…”
Attendant: “I’ll see what I can do.”

BOO YAH!!!

Have Job, Will Travel

2008-10-05T21:42:00.002-06:00

Hey everybody! It's been a long time since I've posted. I think the longest time since we started the blog. All the excuses are the same so I'm not going ot repeat them. In addition to the usual reasons I don't post I have a new one: Facebook. It's true. I've avoided the social-networking site the same way I've avoided all of the other fads on the internet (like photo-sharing and blogging...). I really dig it. It's easy to keep in touch with people and all that, but the thing I really like about it is that people don't have anything to maintain. With this blog, Mandy and I have to always be posting to remind people it exists. If we don't, people rightly stop dropping by. After we start up again, slowly people start checking it again. With Facebook, everyone you have connected with is a potential source of communication. So, even if 99% of the connections don't generate anything new, odds are 1% will and that'll be enough to keep you coming back.

I'm not writing this because I'm going to stop posting to the blog, I just write it to say if you're reading this, and want to stay in closer communiacation with us (other than email, telephone, or in person), Facebook is probably the most consistant way to do it.

----

During my junior year of university life I had to take a class called “Script Writing 101.” I had taken several writing classes, but never anything directly related to the creation of stories for cinema. I can only remember the teacher’s first name, Gretchen, because she worked with friend of mine at the local public access station. She was a nice lady and an apt teacher, though I haven’t thought of her in more than four years.

For our final project, we had choose between writing a script for a short film or the first act of a three-act movie. Being more of a “concept” person, and less of “completing anything I start” person, I decided to go with first act of a full film approach. Further, I had learned that we could do an adaptation, if we so desired. So, not only did I not have to write an entire script, with beginning, middle, and end, I could just crib the idea from someone who is generally regarded as person who has them. I immediately thought of Walter Kirn’s glorious book “Up in the Air.”

The novel “Up in the Air” concerns the life of one Ryan Bingam, a man who literally lives on airplanes. He refers to the netherworld of airports, rental cars, and hotels as “Airworld” a kind of no-man’s-land where marketing ideals and the American Dream actually exist. He claims that there is nothing better than smoking a Marlborough cigarette on the back of a horse or drinking a Coke in a cheesy 50s dinner. It gives one the feeling that they are moving with the right forces.

You can call me Ryan Bingam. Not in the literally sense, of course. I have a residence, a loving wife, a slobbering dog, and two deranged, increasingly feral cats. Unlike Ryan, I really do like my job, my coworkers, and my life. The main thing we two have in common, is we both spend significant amounts of time in Airworld. I wouldn’t go so far as calling it home the way he does, but I am a frequent visitor and have a green card.

I started working for Global one year ago today. Much has changed in that year, both in terms of the logistics of my life, and how I have changed due to my circumstances. Sympathy doesn’t suit this kind of a post. I don’t write any of this to illicit an emotional response. My life is the sum of my personal decisions, for which I take full responsibility. There is no unseen power forcing my hand in any of my choices. I firmly believe that if we like or don’t like an aspect of our own lives, we have no one to blame but ourselves.

Here are some statistics to get us started. I am only including trip I have documentation for. I’m sure the numbers are a bit higher, but I’m hoping err on the conservative side:

Over the course of the past year, I have been on 81 documented flights.

I have changed at least one time zone on all but four flights.

Six of the flights have across the Atlantic Ocean, and one has been across the North Sea (between Norway and Ireland)

Average flight time: 3 hours

Average number of flights per trip: 2.7

Total amount of time gone on business (not including working Denver): 30% of the year (or 3 out of every ten days).

Here is a link to all of the sites I have visited, a little information on each site, and the number of times they have been visited. LINK

If I may, that’s a shit-load of traveling. Prior to this year, my average annual flights were somewhere around 2-3flights. Total. In effect, I have been on 27 times more flights this year, than any year previous.

When I took the job, I was told, in no uncertain terms, that travel would be required. After asking if I was comfortable with air travel (to which I lied in response, saying “Of course I’m comfortable with it!”), I was asked if was married.

I said, “Yes.”

The owner looked away for a bit and asked, “Happily married?”

I said, “Yes, extremely.”

He sighed.

“How long?”

“Have I been married? About a year and a half.”

Again, the sigh. “Did I mention there is travel involved?” He said with a wry, British smile.

My next post will be “Lessons Learned from being on 81 Flights in a Year”

The next will be, “How my life has Changed as a Result”

Stay tuned for some tips!

Bootcamp pt 8

2008-09-24T10:06:00.004-06:00

I almost skipped bootcamp today. I was so tired and the bed was so warm. Alas, I did not give in and got up. Here is what we did:

1 Mile (9min)
15 reps 2 times through

Squat to shoulder press on upside down Bosu ball
Rear foot on Bosu lunge w/bicep curl
Forward food on Bosu lunge w/lat raise
Bosu hip extensions
Upside down Bosu push up w/Brazilian crunch
Chest press on Bosu ball
Bosu knee dip crunches
Bent over row standing on Bosu ball

At the end we were supposed to "save time for a 10 min mile." I got on the treadmill and felt pretty good, so I decided to run at 9:13. At about 1/4 mile Tim came around and started increasing our incline- from 0 to 2. Although difficult, I felt that I could still handle it. It wasn't until he went from 2 to 4 that I felt that I was going to die (not in the literal sense of course). I moved the pace to 9:45 just to keep up. I did have to step off the treadmill for 10 seconds, but I got back on and finished. He waited almost another 1/4 mile before taking off all of the incline. Needless to say, I was really tired when it was all over.

Weekend Wrap up...

2008-09-22T08:49:00.005-06:00

Sorry a head of time....this may be a little long.

Matt and I were sick most of Thursday and Friday. Yes, it was only a cold, but it was bad as we were achy and headachey and grouchy. Saturday I woke up and convinced myself to go to Bootcamp and I'm glad I did.

First a quote from Tim, our trainer: On a scale of 1-10, we are going to be doing about a 12.5. Nice!

Here is what we did:
• Ran to Washington Park
• High knee running 30 seconds
• 8 point body building move 30 seconds
• Butt kickers running 30 seconds
• 2 minutes to complete the following (we went through 2 times)

10 regular push ups
10 crunches
10 wide shoulder push ups
10 lower body crunches
10 tricep push ups
10 full body crunches

• 2 minute to complete the following (2X – second time we did 15 of each)

10 squats
10 lunges (per leg)
10 pile squats
10 curtsey lunges

• Half Plank (on elbows and forearms) – we held the position in a straight line and the person at the front ran and jumped over our legs, we went through two rotations
• Side Planks 30 seconds each side
• Run back to the Gym
The end.....for today :)

Nikki started Intermediate training and she did fairly well. I'm sure she will progress rapidly over the next few weeks.

We hopped over to a friends birthday party later that evening. Although we could only stay about an hour, we had a really great time. We played a game called Apples to Apples and it was a lot of fun - thinking about picking it up this week.

We then met our other friend down at Oktoberfest where we drank some biers and ate some turkey leg. Yum! We planned it out well and were able to get to bed around 12:30am.

Sunday was laid back with a small amount of shopping and driving through some neighborhoods looking at houses. As we were driving past one of the open house signs, Matt pulled over and said we were going to go look through it. It was nice...but I don't know about $850,000!!!

I dropped Matt at the airport around 4:30. He is traveling to LA for a few days. I'm sure he will post something if something interesting happens.

Today I got up and went to Bootcamp, here is what we did:

Section 1
• ¼ mile run in 2 minutes or less
• 3 sets of 30 crunches on Bosu ball
• 3 sets of 24 walking lunges
• 3 set of 15 row machine

Section 2
• ¼ mile run in 2 minutes or less
• 3 sets of 10 stabilizer squat with 1lb weight
• 3 sets of 30 seconds plank on stabilizer ball
• 3 set of 10 bicep curl on stabilizer ball

Section 3
• ¼ mile run in 2 minutes or less
• 3 sets of 12 side crunches
• 3 sets of 15 squats on upside down Bosu ball
• 3 sets of 12 push ups with Brazilian crunch

Section 4
• ¼ mile run in 2 minutes or less
• 3 sets of 15 leg lifts
• 3 set of 15 chest press
• 3 set of 15 lat pull down

Bootcamp pt 4, running group, Bootcamp pt 5....catch up

2008-09-17T10:30:00.002-06:00

This will be a quick wrap-up of what has happened the past couple of days.

Monday morning 6am started Bootcamp pt 4. We met up at the gym again, ran a quick 1 mile and got right into the Life Fitness machines. They have about 20 different machines, which condition a large amount of muscles (quads, triceps, biceps, chest, calves, etc.). We did 2 set of 15 reps each. In between our cycle, our trainer pulled us into the "torture room" as I lovingly call the exercise room. Here he set up 3 areas: inverted leg dip on an upside down Bosu ball, jumproping, rope ladder (two steps between each rung). We did each exercise for 2 minutes.

I also participated in a Running Group on Tuesday night. We ran around the perimeter of City Park (next to the museum Matt works at). The distance is around 3 miles, and boy was I tired by the end of it.

This morning I was in the process of convincing myself to go back to sleep when the guilt set in. The Bootcamp class has only 10 sessions...I'm sure I can make it to every one of them so I got up. Today will be forever known as bands and benches. We met up at Washington Park, ran a mile and got right into the bands session. We used the bands for all sorts of exercises and then when we were tired, we used them some more wrapped around the bike rack. Finally, we headed off to run around the lake again, except this time we stopped at every bench and did 8 bench dips and 10 full body crunches. There are about 12 benches around the lake and I felt the pain at each one. All in all, I am really glad that I got up this morning. I feel great!

Bootcamp pt 3 and the rest of the weekend...

2008-09-15T13:28:00.003-06:00

I woke up on Saturday in less pain than I had been since Wednesday, so I decided it would be ok to go to Bootcamp class, and it turned out really well. The coolness of the morning went away quite quickly as the sun came out from behind the clouds. We jogged over to Washington Park (about a mile) and set up to do circuit training in the grass. There were four areas containing one of the following items: medicine balls, dumbbells, cones, and exercise balls. We worked in each area for 2.5 minutes before moving (bear walk, crab walk, lunging, high knee run) to the next area. We all worked out and sweat furiously, with finality coming as a run back to the gym.

Later that day I met up with one of my friends Athena (no not my cat). We met up at a local place called Cafe Europa and had a great time catching up. Cleaning plagued most of the rest of the day, until I was saved by my friend Eric. He had just bought the 1st season of Mad Men and wanted to watch it. Yeah! Now I had a reason to stop cleaning....for awhile at least. We got some wine and pizza and watched two discs (7 episodes). It's a good show and I can't wait to get together with him again and watch some more.

Sunday I drove Yellow Thunder (our scooter) to Wild Oats and got some different kinds of flour in order to get my "bake-on". I ended up making a couple of different types of yeast bread, banana bread, and peach crisp. IMHO they all taste good. :)

Matt came home from the airport around 6:30pm. It's about time, seeing he was gone for a week. We had just enough time to for him to hug and kiss Nikki as well as sneak in a hug and kiss for me before we went out to dinner with our friends Krishna and Yagnesh who are visiting from Cincinnati, OH. We had some great food at Uoki and then we quickly showed them our house (and crazy dog).

All in all a great weekend!

Bootcamp pt 2

2008-09-10T10:49:00.002-06:00

It was a bit easier getting up for bootcamp this morning, although Nikki looked pretty hung-over. Funny, I don't remember buy her any booze last night. Anyhow, this will be a short post as I am only going to document what I did.

Ran 1 mile (9:13)
60 Pull-ups
120 Push-ups
180 Squats
240 Crunches
Ran 1 mile (9:45)

My armies hurt...sigh...I am taking some Advil now.....

Bootcamp pt1

2008-09-08T10:12:00.001-06:00

The morning was moist…no this is not another Throw Mama from the Train story, this is one of a total different caliber. This one begins a week ago where I paid money to join a month long class named Bootcamp. My thinking was that this was the class I would need to help give me the extra boost to kickn my workouts into a higher gear. My goals included increased stamina, better circulation, overall better feeling, possible weight loss, and fun. Did I say fun?!? Sorry, I am getting ahead of myself.

We met at a building at Washington Park. The sun had not risen…of course it wasn’t in the sky yet, the class starts at 6am! Anyway, I digress…we started off with 30 jumping jacks and moved into some light stretching. We did a warm-up jog/run around the little lake which is approximately 1 mile, then jumped right into the work-out….

I don’t really remember the order in which we did the exercises, after a couple of them it all became a blur. Squats, walking lunges, push-ups, step-ups, jumping side to side, jumping back and forward, plie squats, running, donkey kicks, and some more that I can’t recall at this moment.

I had a funneh thought as I was doing the last run, I actually paid someone to inflict this pain on me? Oh well, as Matt always tells me “You’re a crazy masochistic person!” I guess I will stretch out today and get ready for my next session on Wednesday.

PS Keep the donations for the Susan G Komen run coming in…thanks so much!!

Running a 5K for Susan G Komen foundation, can you help??

2008-09-04T14:36:00.003-06:00

The company that I work for, SPECTRUM Human Resource Systems Corp has decided to sponsor a running group for the Susan G Komen Race for the Cure®. Of course I signed up as I would like to get another race under my belt, but also because I very much support the breast cancer research that this company is known for. My company is paying for my entrance fee, but I am writing to you to ask for a donation to the foundation. Please check out my "personal" page: http://www.komendenver.org/site/TR/Race/General?px=1492659&pg=personal&fr_id=1070&s_tafId=17990

The race will be held on October 5th, which is right around the corner. If you are able to donate please click on the link above and then either click on the Support Mandy! link or Make a Gift link. If you know others who may like give please feel free to forward this on.

Here is some interesting information that the foundation forwarded to me:
The Komen Race for the Cure® is the largest series of 5K runs/fitness walks in the world. In 2008, races will be held in more than 100 U.S. cities and 3 foreign countries. Over 1.3 million participants are expected to attend. These race series help fund important breast cancer research, as well as, breast health initiatives on a local level. 75% of the proceeds remain in the local communities where the race is held. 25% of the Race proceeds help fund breast cancer research.

Thanks for your support!
~Mandy

I have heard there are troubles of more than one kind.
Some come from ahead and some come from behind.
But I've bought a big bat. I'm all ready you see.
Now my troubles are going to have troubles with me!
~Dr. Seuss

Califonia Academy of Science

2008-08-22T11:54:00.002-06:00

Back from the land of fog and crazyness. San Francisco, the odd city that it is. I will put up a few posts over the next couple of days detailing a couple of the interesting places and peeps I met. Most of the time we worked. Oh, how we worked. We worked so hard at putting together a video of how hard we worked, and worked hard at it.

Here it is! Love, and lots of it, to everyone!

The hilarious dog-ness....

2008-08-14T09:00:00.003-06:00

Matt and I get so much entertainment from Nikki. From not being able to grip the hardwood floor to over-sized jowls flapping in the breeze, everyday is a new adventure. I have decided to share a few...

Earlier this year, I took her outside to go to the bathroom thinking that it was business as usual. As she was squatting to go potty (poo to be exact) a fly went by her which made her pinch it off and run to the other end of the yard.

A couple of months ago my mom and I were walking around the neighborhood. We stopped to let her sniff the grass. Lo' and behold another dog had been in this area and his/her owners did not pick up after them. Nikki, not paying attention as usual, stepped in the poo. Feeling this new scary thing on her foot, she leapt in the air and landed behind us on the sidewalk.

Last night Nikki and I were walking around the neighborhood, again. As we were coming up to this one yard I noticed a couple of statues in the grass. As we passed I saw that they were two dogs squatting with bubbles over their heads that said 'No poo' and 'Not here'. I thought they were cute - Nikki was terrified. I looked down and she had her eyes all bugged out and was trying to get away as quickly as possible. For the next block she kept turning back and giving them the stink eye.

Check this out...

2008-08-06T08:58:00.005-06:00

Last night we watched a spectacular documentary named War Dance. Set in the Northern part of Uganda, it followed a group of school children who were competing in a dance/song competition. I really liked it because it was able to tell a story of the school on the way to the competition along with giving a background on three of the children without any lull points. The music and cinematography were excellent. Make sure you have tissues, this one will make you cry.

Information about the organization helping children in Northern Uganda can be found here:

Shine Global

Absolutly Bas-Ass Spaceship Blog!

2008-08-04T14:12:00.003-06:00

Thanks to MetaFilter for this link. It's a blog of really good, high-quality scans of spaceship concept art. Bonus cool thing: It's a blogspot blog.

http://conceptships.blogspot.com/

IPS Dome Breakdown

2008-08-01T12:59:00.001-06:00

Here's a quick video I shot and a co-worker edited detailing the company breaking down our vendor dome. Enjoy! (be careful of volume)

Hello Mr. DJ? (Pt. II)

2008-07-18T23:50:00.001-06:00

4th of July and Travel

2008-07-12T22:58:00.003-06:00

(One of my more successful firework pics)

I am writing to you live from San Francisco, where I have to returned to work on another planetarium. The weather here is not what I was expecting. In fact, the city itself is not what I was expecting. 'Frisco has a certain grime and dirtiness I wasn't prepared for. I guess that comes from basing all of my assumptions its various depictions in movies. It's not a bad place. There are many good restaurants and cool shops to check out, don't get me wrong. But what justifies it being one of the most expensive places in the United States to live? Is really that cool?

The visit to the homeland of Grand Rapids was wonderful. Mandy ran the Buck Creek 5K, we had a great 4th of July party (complete with a fireworks-prompted visit by the law--link to pics), a well-executed surprise party for Jess (link to pics), and many other tales of fanciful whimsy. I will try to migrate these pics over to Flickr, once it stops acting like a bitch and lets me upload again.

I left on Wednesday last week (the 9th of July) for San Fran. Mandy has stayed on a few additional days and will be leaving tomorrow with her mom and Nikki to drive back to Denver. Her mom is then flying back out to Grand Rapids at some point early next week. I will be returning home on the 23rd or 24th of July, returning just in time for a visit from Chad. Wish Mandy and family good luck on their travels.

It's been a crazy summer so far. It's been great to have so many visitors come out to Denver. It's also been equally amazing that I have found ways to be there at the same time they've come to visit. By the time I get back home, I will have been gone for over a month... a long time to be away from home. I'm looking forward to being back there for a little while before heading out again. Maybe I'll get some time to ride our new moped, an amazing 150CC monster. I will take pictures of it when I get back and write a little post on the guy who sold it to us, and why we think it's a good investment.

That's it from San Fran. Peace n' love!

Satisfied / Exhausted

2008-07-03T16:35:00.004-06:00

I am sitting on an Amtrak train in Chicago waiting for it to depart. I am connected via a wireless cell modem that the company I work for has bought us to use around the US and in the UK. It's a nice fringe benefit for working there. It does, however, come at a cost, even if it's not a monetary one.

This past week (9 days in total) was IPS. The International Planetarium Society meeting. IPS is the single largest gathering of planetarium vendors, directors, content producers, immersive display engineers, and VR junkies in the world. It only happens every other year, and it alternates what side of the Atlantic it's held on. Next time (2010) it will be held in Egypt. Due to its size and our status as a relative new-comer to this field, it was vitally important that we showed well. In the end, I think we did that, though, and at the risk of repeating myself, it came at a cost.

We demoed two of type of ulta-black projectors (500,000 to 1 sequential contrast) that SEOS develops. These two projectors were placed in a 15' fiberglass dome and fitted with two tons (4,000 lbs) of gear shipped out from the UK at some exorbitant price. The dome assembly and subsequent fitting of gear began last week Wednesday (the 25th of June) and continued through the end of the show (July 3rd). To assemble the dome and make all of the gear function, we assembled a team of five engineers, two project managers, and a carpenter. In addition to that, we had to use union teamsters, electricians, and decorators. Apparently, this is required by law. Some of these guys were great, and I had a good time ordering them around. Others, however, were not. For example, we had to wait for 2 hours for a union decorator to arrive so he could Velcro our black curtains over the dome, a job any one of us could have completed in less than 10 minutes. The dome went up with little trouble. Since I have no experience assembling such things, I concentrated on getting the servers and projectors functioning. Here our troubles began.

I don't want to bore anyone who has read this far with all of the technical hurdles we had to overcome throughout the show, but I can at least say it was intensely frustrating. There were more times than I'd like to remember where the group of us would work for 18-20 hours straight and be worse off than we were when we started.

In spite of these difficulties (or maybe because of them) we came off as a very cohesive group. The general attitude from show-goers was that we were very professional, approachable, and technically adept. I think I'd agree with everything, but there is obviously much room left for improvement. These tradeshows need to be managed like any other project and have the same time and resources applied to them as there would be for any other project we do. If not, we're going to end up Egypt running around like headless chickens with flashlights. [Interestingly, in Egypt we will not be allowed to wear our black polos, since black is only worn by people in mourning].

Our central showpiece on the night we sponsored was a project called Space Confidential. It was sort of a contest to get teenagers to produce content using the our software. It worked really well. The two winning girls were flown out with their mothers to Chicago for the event, where they presented the space show they had created and answered questions about how they did it. It was especially good since all of the rest of the main-stage presentations were tech-demos. Ours really got to the heart of the idea that content still is king.

We finally have a new site up that goes into more detail about what we do, who we are, etc. You can check it out here. The web tester in me has already noticed a slew of grammatical errors and dead links and will be passed on to the company designing the site.

I've posted a bunch of pictures I took at the summit on our Flickr stream. The stream can be accessed by clicking on a picture on the little slideshow applet running on the right-hand navigation bar.

It's 3:30 in the morning... do you know where your geek is?

2008-06-28T02:22:00.005-06:00

Sorry for the delay in posting. Yesterday, I worked from 7:00AM to 5:30AM, with very few breaks for eating, etc. I slept from 5:45AM until 10:00AM and have worked straight until now... 3:30AM. I don't write this to complain. In fact, I'm having a great time. It's been a little stressful with some of our preparations going awry, but everything seems to be falling in place. The light at the end of the tunnel is due, in no small part, to the amazingly diverse and flat-out brilliant peeps I work with. It's been a great ride so far, and we haven't even opened the doors to public yet.

Currently, I'm sitting in the server-room of the Adler Planetarium waiting for a cohort to return with a license dongle to activate a server we have here. I will write more about this nifty piece of hardware, but only after its unveiled. Imagine the announcement of the G3 iPhone, except for planetarium nerds. It's going to be that cool.

I have been taking lots of pics (some actually are pretty good) with my new lens, and will posting them once I've had more than 18 minutes to sleep. All is well in the Chi-Town. Peace n' love!

IPS Update 1

2008-06-25T22:27:00.003-06:00

I think I'm going to try to do video updates while I'm here. I have the camera and I'm way too tired to do much typing, so here it is. Peace n' love from the windy city.

(Tired Matt rambling about domes and whatnot in Chicago)

On the Move

2008-06-22T10:39:00.005-06:00

Everyone's on the move. This next month is going be crazy for all of us. Here's a quick breakdown of our travels. While reaching us here in Denver will be ny-on impossible, you can still reach us on our cells, email, text messages, twitter accounts, and blog posts. With the various modes of communication available to us now, there's no excuse to not get in touch.

I am going to bring my web cam with me. Time-permitting, I will post a few video updates on IPS in Chicago, the integration in San Francisco, and the festivities back in Grand Rapids.

Matt
San Francisco - June 22 - June 25
Chicago - June 25 - July 3
Grand Rapids - July 3 - 9
San Francisco - July 9 - 18

Mandy
On the road between Denver and Grand Rapids - ~~June 25 - June 26~~
June 27 - 28
Grand Rapids - June 26 - July 14
On the road between Denver and Grand Rapids - July 14-16

Mandy's Mom
Flying from Grand Rapids to Denver - June 24th
Denver - ~~June 24 - June 25~~
June 24 - 27
On the road between Denver and Grand Rapids - ~~June 25 - June 26~~
June 27 - 28
Grand Rapids - June 26 - July 14
On the road between Denver and Grand Rapids - July 14-16

Jess and Mike
Flying from Denver to Grand Rapids - June 23

On the road again... just can't wait to get on the road again...

VIDEO - Surgeon Uses Robot to fold Origami

2008-06-18T11:38:00.001-06:00

Impressive. The wingspan of the bird is less than the length of a penny. The robot arms move so fluidly, it looks like the doc is right there. Actually, he was on the other side of the country, controling the robot from over the internet. Impressive.

This is quite the toolset

2008-06-15T23:27:00.002-06:00

This is a 1,470 piece tool set available at Sears. Insanity.

Simple Post - Pic

2008-06-15T22:44:00.002-06:00

BBQ: Hell. Yes.

2008-06-13T12:52:00.006-06:00

This guy knows how to BBQ. Like a pro, he's even using implements of torture.

I love BBQ'ing. There's something so immediate and primal about reducing cooking to the basics: Gather food, apply heat, eat. I love it. It's simple, it involves things on fire, bits of animal flesh, and, of course, eating.

The BBQ'ing season is upon us. This summer, I plan to smoke, cook, and consume my own bacon. No, not bacon made out of Matt, just regular bacon made by me out of pork. As much as I'd love to eat Matt Bacon... mmm... Matt Bacon.

It turns out that it's not that complicated a process. To do it, a person needs a smoker, some raw pork belly (complete with piggy hair that needs to be shaved prior to smoking), plastic bags, and curring agents (mostly salt and sugar).

Here are few links that suggest different methods of preparing the bacon.

I am going to check with the butcher down the road about procuring the necessary pork stomach lining this weekend, and report back with pricing and some pics.

Francis Bacon. Known as the catalyst of the scientific revolution in England. Also: First mayor of Baconsville.

School Lesson: Never trust authority figures

2008-06-12T21:40:00.005-06:00

A school in California shocked the students by telling them that 20 students were killed in a drunk driving accident. The ~~fifth-graders (yes, they were in 5th grade)~~ High school students obviously went crazy, cried, some went hysterical.

Then they told the students no one had died, and they better not drink and drive.

A teacher is quoted as saying, "We wanted them traumatized." I guess they succeeded.

What person, in what twisted version of reality would think this is a good idea? Unbelievable. I hope they did learn their lesson: Never trust authority figures.

It's all coming together....

2008-06-09T13:42:00.003-06:00

The past weekend was strictly working time. Saturday we spent the day cleaning and organizing the loft. It is amazing how much crap you can accumulate over the years....what am I a saying, we just moved into this place last December! Anyhow, we had many things that we moved that we were going to "deal with when we get there"....Saturday was the day.

Sunday we took a drive over to an unmentionable large store. Although we felt very dirty walking through it we had no other choice as they were the only place in town that carried the items that we liked and needed: end table, small dresser, and wardrobe. We assembled the wardrobe and end table last night while we watched Henry VIII on Masterpiece Theater.

The next three weeks will be busy as we are having people visit from Michigan. The Valentine's will be in Denver this week - we plan to spend Wednesday and Thursday with them. Jess and Mike are coming out next Tuesday and staying for about atweek. Mom will be coming out the day after they leave and staying for almost a week. Then her and I hit the road (with Nikki in the back seat) and drive back to Michigan for the 4th of July festivities. I will be in GR the first couple of weeks in July. If you want to hang out you can either write me email or call my cell phone (or my parent's phone after June 29th).

Matt has bestowed upon me luscious gifts for our Anniversary: KitchenAid mixer and a Cuisinart Food Processor. We made pizza last night. I used the mixer to make the dough and Matt use the Food Processor to make the sauce. The pizza turned out fantastic and we had a lot of fun creating it. More info to come on the creations from the new appliances!!!

(Nikki's feet don't even touch the bottom of the fountain.)

Busy couple of weeks....

2008-05-31T09:16:00.008-06:00

Sheesh!!! The past couple of weeks have been a whirlwind.

We began and are almost finished with painting our room. We will post pics on Flickr when it is totally done.

In case you haven't heard I completed my first 10K - the Bolder Boulder. It was pretty challenging and a lot of fun. I am looking forward to doing at least one, if not two, more before I come back to GR in July. Hopefully this time around I won't do yard work and painting two days beforehand.

This is what pain looks like.

I have changed my major.
I have now decided to become a vet technician. I have enrolled in a Technical Institute out here named Bel-rae. They are a small school and the only program that they offer is for vet tech. My classes start September 29th!!!!

Lovin' The Star Wars

2008-05-14T19:31:00.003-06:00

This video has been floating around the intertubes for a while now, but I thought I'd share it with the crowd out there. Watch it through to the end, and if you're at all a Star Wars fan, you will laugh. Oh, how you'll laugh.

Foster's Australian for....

2008-05-13T11:37:00.003-06:00

There seems to be at least one Aussie that needs to get the priorities straightened out: Beer

Sheesh!!

United Airlines Sucks

2008-05-11T20:37:00.001-06:00

I am now getting close to entering my third hour of waiting on a plane. The cause? A 'slide' is missing. No one seems to know what this means, but here we sit nonetheless. The best part is I won't get to my hotel before 1AM at the earliest, and I have to work at 7AM EST. Woot.

I better get some frequent-flier points or something for this.

Reckless Abandon

2008-05-11T16:00:00.004-06:00

It's hard to come across any true absurdest humor. Adding something strange to a setting does not make it absurd, it just makes it silly. It's hard to see that perfect balance of something odd, not repeated somewhere else, and accessible. Behold: A funny video...

Damn. Five minutes after posting the above video, I found another by these guys. They're called "Waverly Films" and they're amazing. It reminds of me of some videos me and some friends made in high school and after. We always had a deep appreciation for good absurdist humor. One of our earliest (in my opinion funniest) videos was an interviewer asking a man it it was true that he couldn't stand having nickels next to his ears. The interviewee says, "Yes." Smiles and winks. The skit ends with a shot of the interviewee staring at the camera and two nickles appearing next to his head. He gasps and the screen goes blank. I love it to this day... and if anyone reads this blog and still has this video accessable, I am kindly requesting that they upload it on YouTube or something so I can embed it here for the dropmystraw audience (all three of you).

I especially enjoy absurdist humor that has a twinge of maliciousness running through it. Think of a band like Ween. They are very talented musicians, and enjoyment of the music comes not only from the melodies and rhythm, but also the humor. And the humor itself is profoundly absurdist, and profoundly creepy. A great example is the song "Spinal Meningitis," wherein the band sings about a child who has spinal meningitis and is asking if he's going to, "see God." The enjoyment comes from it being so absurd and evil and well performed. It's a strange combination that many people don't seem to get into, but I love it. Here's the great example from these "Waverly Film" peeps. Enjoy.

Tomorrow's the run

2008-05-09T21:07:00.001-06:00

We are Jess and Mike's house getting ready for the Riverbank Run tomorrow. The shirts have arrived (and no one has collected theirs except Chad and Megan). We're all stoked and ready to go down and chill with the masses. I am going to bring my camera with me and take pictures as we talk. I'll post them on the Flickr stream when time allows.

Hello, Mr. DJ?

2008-05-06T13:29:00.001-06:00

(Pardon me, but can you tell how to get to the Soviet embassy ...?)

UK pictures and other miscellaneous items of potential interest

2008-05-01T16:16:00.010-06:00

After many problems with our crappy Mac uploader "JetPhoto Studio", we've finally gotten our good UK pictures up on Flickr. The Flickr slideshow stream on the right-hand navigation bar should be showing the last 10-15 photos we uploaded. I am still in process of naming and organizing all the pictures into their respective sets and collections, so if you check them out right away, they won't be named or have any hilarious notes written on them. We will create a set of our top ten favorite pictures from the collection once they are all organized. I'll post about it later, when we've assembled the set.

I am still in partial-recovery mode from the knee surgery last Friday. My pain meds have run out, so it's back to the grind (literally) as I work on getting my knee up to snuff for the 5K walk in a little over a week. I have an official go-ahead from my doc, so I'm not really worried about blowing the knee up right after having it worked on. There is lingering surgery pain, but the chronic pain that I had been dealing with for the past few years seems to have abated some. That, and the horrendous grinding/snapping sounds that would accompany any lateral movement of my calf have also greatly diminished. So far I have to say I'm very pleased with the outcome.

Now that I've had a few days off for medical leave, I've been able to get a some things done that have been piling up due to me being out of the state on business and plain, old procrastination. I now have an official Colorado license, I am registered to vote, washed, vacuumed, and got an oil change for the car, and have two new pairs of glasses on order. The last thing I really should do with this semi-free time is go in for a teeth cleaning. I dread this as I'm pretty sure I have a cavity that needs filling, and we have no dental insurance. Alas. Might as well get it done before they all fall out.

Nikki has been having doggy-seizures. We've always been kind of suspicious that when she stares off into the distance and her head begins to shake (like a palsy, not a foaming, rabid grand mal kind of thing), it might be a seizure. She has been having them more frequently (she had a good 5-minute one this morning), so we decided to set up an appointment with our vet to get some tests run and try out some anti-seizure medication. Another clinching thing is that Nikki is having many of the side-effects from seizures on dogs are prone to. She looses her appetite before having one (she refused to eat breakfast and even treats this morning - just before having a seizure). She'll also get restless and won't sleep. Hopefully we'll know more tomorrow when her appointment is done.

That's about it from here. We're heading out to GR next week Thursday and will be sticking around until Sunday at the earliest. I have work at the Smithsonian in DC and in Minneapolis starting that Monday, so I don't know if I'll leaving Sunday night late, or Monday morning early.

(I want one very badly.)

Surgery, Travel, and Bacon

2008-04-25T18:26:00.007-06:00

Just got my kneecap scraped by a steady-handed surgeon here in Denver. This was done to correct issues lingering from my heroic knee-injury of nearly ten years past. I was put under general anesthetic (totally knocked out) then scraped, and awoken with a video of the procedure in hand. I have included that video below for those of you who want to see a shredded knee from the inside, and how it is shaved and cleaned up. I think it's pretty cool.

(Inner-space)

I recieved a present for my impending birthday last night: four pounds of Father's Bacon. Father's Bacon! Father's is the Roles Royce of the bacon underground. It's cured so perfectly, that no refridgeration is needed. It is considered by many the greatest bacon made. I have a long-standing discussion with Mandy's dad about my love for bacon and how I really want to smoke my own this summer (I have already bought the smoker), and how I should buy him a bacon-of-the-month subscription. It seems he and Sue beat me to the punch with this delivery. So, tomorrow, to celebrate my birthday, I will stay laid up on the couch and eat me some bacon.

(I call this "Knee Injury with Bacon, Cookies, Pain Medication, and Dog")

We are still planning to be back in Grand Rapids over the weekend of the 10th of May for the River Bank Run. Depending on how that knee heals and becomes stable, I am planning to do the walk. The Torpedo Monkey t-shirts have already arrived at Mandy's parent's house and are ready to be picked up. We'll be sending more out about what we're planning to do before and after the room, so keep checking the Torpedo Monkey blog for more info.

Too much Torpedo Monkey!

Amen, mama

2008-04-10T14:56:00.004-06:00

This editorial restores some of my faith in humanity. It's about a mother who (gasp!) let her 9-year-old child ride (gasp!) the subway by themselves. In... NEW YORK! (isn't that where the terrorists go?). And despite the raging horrors that lie in wait for every child who isn't tagged with a cell phone, bicycle helmet, or a private investigator trailing their every movement, the child actually made it home in one piece.

It's very refreshing to see this one example of a calm, reasoned response to the ridiculous amount misplaced fear inflicting our culture. The only thing that would be better is if this didn't illicit a blog response due to its extreme rarity. It wish it were a common thing that people take a second to consider the real difference between the percieved and actual threats lying in wait for them and their children.

Read the whole thing, it's great.

Link to article.

Cool Idea....

2008-04-08T10:01:00.004-06:00

While reading the news on the BBC website I ran across this article. It seems there is a new automated restaurant in Germany where customers order their food via a touch screen and then they receive their food from a machine which looks like a roller coaster.

I don't think this will take over all of our restaurants, but it is a really cool idea.

I want to eat there!

Back in the States

2008-04-07T12:52:00.003-06:00

We made it back safe and sound. Well, safe at any rate. We're still decompressing from the flights and jet-lag. Mandy's back to the testing grind and I'm off to NASA for a couple days, so it's business as usual around here.

I am going to recount the trip in some kind of blog form as time permits. We have gigs and gigs of images to organize, name, and arrange in sets and collections. Our two traveling companions Dean and Erin also took gobs of pics that they have started to upload to Flickr. In fact, we used their TomTom GPS satellite navigation gadget to get us around the country, and there is a feature that should let Dean upload our driving routes to Google maps. We're also going to organize a top ten list of pics for those of you (like me) who don't want to rummage through 200 pages of pictures without any kind of context.

All of this should be coming within the next couple weeks as, again, time permits.

I think the twitter thing was pretty cool. I would've kept it more up-to-date as I traveled, but I had a horrible time getting my phone to work with the UK cell system and I am lazy. I'm going to try it again with this trip to NASA to see if I will be any better at it in the states. If not, I'm going to drop it from the right-hand nav. I only want to keep things there that I have an intention of keeping updated.

I've been listening to the new Gnarls Barkley CD. The first time I heard it, I wasn't impressed. I listened again, and was still not that impressed. But the third time... the third time is a charm. It also may have been the first time I listened to it, it was through a FM transmitter built into the GPS, playing out of the car stereo speakers while I drove around the UK, for the first time, on the wrong side of the road. The second time was through a pair of noise-canceling headphones, on a 747, floating over the middle of the Atlantic ocean, bonked out of my head on jet lag and stress. This morning I listened, uninterrupted, through my new reciever, and it totally changed my mind on it. Anyway, here's a video from it.

Meet me on the other side of the world

2008-04-04T11:26:00.003-06:00

Remember, remember the Fifth of November,
The Gunpowder Treason and Plot,
I know of no reason
Why Gunpowder Treason
Should ever be forgot.

Last night in the UK. We're flying out on the BA0297 to Chicago with a quick two hour jump Denver and into the waiting paws of a slobbering doggy and two very pissed off cats. I can't wait. I've been out of the country for half a month now, and a week of that was spent working (fun though it was, it's still work).

The trip has been great fun. We saw a sizable chunk of the Greatest of Britians, but now it's time to return to ole' Stars and Stripes, home of the boogie-board sized steak and magical, ever-descending dollar.

(HDR Image we took of Bodiam Castle)

London Heathrow Airport Crazyness

2008-03-28T05:35:00.003-06:00

From a Bloomberg Press article titled, "Heathrow T5 Opening `Chaotic'"

March 27 (Bloomberg) -- London Heathrow airport's 4.3 billion-pound ($8.6 billion) fifth terminal canceled flights after the baggage system broke down on the first day of operations, prompting passengers to brand the opening ``chaotic.''

As many as 68 inbound and outbound flights were scrapped by British Airways Plc, the terminal's sole occupant. Baggage check- in was halted while Heathrow owner BAA Ltd. worked to resolve ``operational issues'' and the airline said in a statement passengers should fly with hand luggage only, rebook for another day or claim a refund."

Guess which airline, airport, and terminal Mandy is flying into this morning...

There's a hole in the world, like a big black pit...

2008-03-22T20:13:00.005-06:00

And it's filled with people that are filled with shit.
And all the vermin of the world inhabit it.
And it's called... London."
-Sweeny Todd

So, I'm off across the pond yet again. Only, this time it will end with my friends Dean and Erin and my beloved Mandy joining me in the Big Smoke, where we will spend a week touring Scottland and the eastern coast of England.

Rather than put random postings on the blog, I am going to try something new this time around. I am going to maintain a Twitter feed at the behest of my friend Josh. To use this feature, you will need to subscribe to the Twitter RSS feed. This is really, really simple. It's so simple, in fact, that I have already added the RSS feed to the right-hand nav on the Blog (where it reads "Matt's Twitter Feed" and everytime you refresh the page, if I have added something new, you will see it). If you would like to subscribe, simple click this link LINK. Then, on your browser of choice, click the Subscribe Now button, and the feed will be added to your bookmarks. Then, to follow our progress around the globe, you simple have to check the feed and you'll see. If you have any problems getting this to work, either post a comment or email me and I'll step you through it.

I am heading over to the UK to attend the Immersive Cinema conference, an amazing conglomeration of the visionaries guiding the dome, curved-wall, and virtual reality crowd. The web-page for the conference can be found here, and the itinerary of amazing speakers can be found here. I know four of the people giving talks, and one of them, Mr. Dan Neafus, is giving the keynote speech on the last day on of the con. I am bringing my beautiful Canon XTi with me, so I will be posting and live-blogging as much of the conference as I am able to attend.

Either way: I'm off! And soon, so is Mandy, Dean, and Erin to explore the Ole' Country 'Cross the Pond. Love and well-wishes to the lot of ya'!

(Starballs are sweet!)

The Tongue

2008-03-21T17:04:00.002-06:00

"It can't be bargained with! It can't be reasoned with! The tongue doesn't know pity, or remorse, or fear... and it absolutely will not stop, ever, until you are licked!"
-The Terminator

BBC Again - This time with alien birds

2008-03-21T16:57:00.002-06:00

Mandy and I watched this at home and laughed so hard we had to see if the clip was floating out here somewhere. Guess what! It was!

(What planet is are these birds from?)

The BBC and the co.

2008-03-18T11:18:00.005-06:00

The company I work for has recently been showcased by the BBC. Being a company based out of the UK, it makes sense. It's also because we recently installed the projection, audio, and real-time space simulation system at the largest digital dome in the UK.

Since the BBC is made up of boogers, I can't embed the video in the blog, so you'll have to follow this link to see the videos of my boss and co. talking about how super-sweet our presentation solution is. We rock!

Here's a more detailed article on the technology we use, with specific emphasis on the projectors we use. Sadly, I have note been able to convince them to give me one as a bonus, but I'll wear 'em down, so says I. Aarrgghhh... (that's my pirate projector voice)

Cutest bear ever!!!

2008-03-17T12:38:00.004-06:00

I don't know about you, but it looks like a stuffed animal to me. Her name is Flocke, which means flake in German (as in snowflake).

For more cute pics check out this website.

Here she is....

2008-03-14T17:05:00.003-06:00

Our singing and licking doggy.....

Building Bases on the Moon! Woot!

2008-03-13T23:21:00.003-06:00

While I am a big fan of exploration, I can't help but watch this and think of David Cross when he pretended to be a homeless man asking a lady for some money for food. She replies, "No, we don't have any money to give you for food... we're putting a robot on the moon!"

Laugh or Cry?

2008-03-12T20:52:00.002-06:00

The headlines says it all, "Sheriff: Kansas woman sat on boyfriend's toilet for 2 years; didn't want to leave bathroom"

And

"WICHITA - Authorities are considering charges in the bizarre case of a woman who sat on her boyfriend's toilet for two years - so long that her body was stuck to the seat by the time the boyfriend finally called police.

Ness County Sheriff Bryan Whipple said it appeared the 35-year-old Ness City woman's skin had grown around the seat. She initially refused emergency medical services but was finally convinced by responders and her boyfriend that she needed to be checked out at a hospital."

I think... cry.

Link: http://www.mercurynews.com/ci_8547307?source=rss

It's been a long day coming...

2008-03-09T20:03:00.004-06:00

Hey all,
This is the first post in a while. I'm hell-bent on posting more than last year (128), and I haven't been doing very well with that resolution.

The main cause for the delay has been sheer busyness. But, everyone's busy, so that's really not much of an excuse. My grandma died on 21st of February, and I could use my grieving as an excuse for not posting, but that's not it either. Sometimes I lose interest, and sometimes I don't. I think that's about it.

I am planning a long write-up on my grandma, my thoughts on her death, and how she's impacted my life, but this isn't that post. I need to think more on it before I post something.

I was out at NASA Ames Research Center last week and this week I'm off to Houston (to buy me some pants -Beck) then from Houston to NYC until next week Tues. Then home for four days, and I'm off to the UK for two weeks. It goes without saying that I'll be as busy as always, but it shouldn't stop me from posting and updating. I will make a conscious effort to post more over the next few weeks as I bounce from one side of the country to the other, from one side of the world to the other. I have recently updated the cool-ass Google Map on the right-hand navigation bar with my visit to NASA, and will update it as I pop around the next few weeks.

Updates:

1. As I mentioned before, my Grandma (on my father's side) died on the 21st. She wanted the funeral and visitation to be done with as soon as possible, so she died on a Thursday, the visitation was on Friday, and the funeral was on Saturday. Mandy and I literally jumped on a plane and did a crazy circuit with family and friends for the few days we were there. I will write more on this later.

2. Nikki, our dog, graduated from her Pet Smart Beginner's Training course. The cool thing is, the class has a practice exam before the real one, that way the dogs have two chances to complete the list of commands they have to obey. Nikki passed on the practice exam, a week earlier than the time normally allotted. Only her and one other dog out of a class of ten completed early. The teacher of the class told us we should run her through the rest of the classes because she's smart enough to complete them, so we're signed up for the intermediate. Hopefully she'll pass, and be as well-behaved as Mandy's sister's dog Stormy. Either way, Nikki did really well and has been adapting to her new behavior modification like a champ. She's so smart... (*Note: If this is how I talk up my dog's training, just wait until we have kids... there will be no end to it)

3. The house here in Denver is really shaping up. Thanks to all the help from Mandy's parents, we have a fully functioning set of curtains in our newly painted kitchen and an awesome fold-out spice rack on its way in the mail. Mandy painted the upstairs, and we've put in a faux-bamboo roll-up to cover the closet, and bought new office furniture. As we find places for the rest of the crap, the upstairs is finally turning into a work / living space. Our next steps are to finish the furnishing of the living room, paint that area, then start working on the master and guest bedrooms. By the time people come out to visit this Spring / Summer, we'll be mostly done decorating and organizing.

4. Work has been crazy for both of us. Mandy is hard at work pointin' out bugs in her HR software. Point of fact, the other day, she found a bug so devastating it might delay the whole product launch. Go Mandy! My work has involved lots of traveling, big displays systems, and crazy dancer / astrophysicists (it's true). I have begun my HSPD 12 security clearance process, which should take about six months. It's a security clearance I need to access NASA computer system as well as gain access to any NRL (National Research Laboratory) sites. Some of you will be getting calls from the goverment asking about my ability to handle sensitive government docs. Whatever you do, don't tell them about that time I ruled the small island-country of "Kalembesh" in the Adriatic sea.

That's about it from here. Many of these items need more info and updating, I realize. I will be doing my best to fill in the gaps of these past few weeks, and will work harder on putting up more content.

Thanks for tuning in!

BEWARE....

2008-02-21T07:28:00.008-07:00

THE JACKAL

She comes from all directions!!!!

You have been warned....

The Beatles Music in FIlm

2008-02-16T13:22:00.002-07:00

Mandy and I watched "Across The Universe" last weekend. If you are a Beatles fan I would recommend seeing it once, just for the music. If not, you could as easily skip it and not miss very much. The most striking thing about the music of The Beatles, is how transcendent it is. The simple melodies and 4/4 rock timing of the majority of their songs is simple, bordering on formulaic, but it's still so good. As an example of how Beatles music can carry even the simplest imagery, here is one of the most toe-curling cute videos I've ever seen, and it's topical.

Enjoy!

Airports...

2008-02-11T19:50:00.000-07:00

Some days, I guess, you shouldn’t try to fly. Today is one of those days. It went down thus:

I got a ride out to the airport with my trusty cabbie Pamela (yes, I know her name… I travel a lot). Arrived at DIA around 9:00AM, breezed through the check-in line and security, and with a quick stop off at Einstein Brother’s Bagels, I was on my way to the gate to catch my 10:49 flight to Raleigh. After arriving, eating my bagel and drinking my coffee, I looked up at the digital marquee to notice the flight had been delayed to 11:15. Not terribly unusual. I shrugged, put on the new Hot Chip CD (Rolling Stone gave it 4 stars, by the way), and continued reading a great book by Jimmy Carter.

I didn’t hear the announcement since I had my noise-canceling headphones, so when I looked up and noticed the departure time had changed to the awful, blinking “Plane Being Serviced” message which really means, “You’re Screwed” I pulled my headphones off and asked kindly elder gentleman next to me what was up. He looked over his crossword puzzle at me and, this is true, pulled his spectacles down saying, “The fucking place is fucking delayed until God fucking knows when.” He must have been filling out a naughty crossword, I think to myself. Too startled to respond, I picked up my bag and walked over to the counter to ask the flight attendant what was up. It turns out something was wrong with the plane, and that we would be delayed for another hour.

I chose a seat further away from the man suffering from what had to be Turrets Syndrome, and kept reading my book, but with my headphones off.

“Passengers on flight 802 to Raleigh/Durham. Things are looking up. We’ve secured another plane, and will be departing within the next 30 minutes at Gate B50.” A slight cheer went up and we all shambled one gate over to wait for our plane. I didn’t bother to put on my headphones again and kept reading my book.

Thirty minutes passed before the same flight attendant piped up, “Passengers on flight 802 to Raleigh/Durham…we seem to be missing one of our flight attendants. No one knows where she’s gotten off to, but as soon as she’s on the plane, we’ll begin boarding.”

Another thirty minutes pass and he pipes up, “The flight attendant has been found. We will begin boarding shortly.”

Twenty minutes pass and the flight attended, obviously frustrated, comes back on, “Well, ladies and gentlemen, it turns out the GPS on this plane won’t start. We have a decision time of one hour. In one hour we will make a determination about the departure time. Please note, this is not the departure, this is the decision time.”

An hour passes. “Ladies and gentlemen, t he plane has been fixed and is certified to fly. We will begin boarding in twenty minutes.” A louder cheer goes up from the crowd.

Twenty minutes pass. “Ladies and gentlemen, the captain has refused the flight. We are attempting to rectify. We will give more information as it becomes available.” At this point several suit-and-Bluetooth-headset wearing glitterati leap from their seats and crowd the attendant’s desk with shouts of suing, lawyers, and more suing. This, apart from the swearing 70-year-old man, was the most amusing part of the whole ordeal. I put down my book and listened to this alpha-males, now emasculated by this flamboyantly gay flight attendant, puff their chests and pound the desk. It was very reminiscent of the scene from Fear and Loathing where the police chiefs are trying to check into the Flamingo Hotel and gay clerk is messing with them. It was a delight to behold.

Another thirty minutes pass. “Ladies and gentlemen, the a new plane has been found and we will begin boarding in two hours at gate B33.”

So… here I am. In the airport bar eating a burger and drinking a diet coke. If this plane does actually take passengers on, and gets airborn, and lands in one piece, I’ll be as amazed as you.

Rocket Man!!!

2008-02-09T12:08:00.000-07:00

My work requires me to travel quite a bit. The traveling is pretty interesting as it affords me the opportunity to see how completely homogeneous the world is. It really is the same everywhere. From the music played on the radio, to the chain stores, to the types of cars. I'm sure this feeling would lessen if I had to fly out to Cambodia and consult on a display system in the middle of the steaming jungle, but so far it's just been Western cities and countries I've visited. So, my view is naturally skewed.

Anyway, to keep track of the places I've visited and to supply some information on the types of virtual reality displays and what the clients are trying to use them for. There is a new link added to the right-hand nav that says "Matt's Travels." Clicking the link will bring you to a custom Google map that shows all of the displays and, when not prohibited by Federal Law, I've included some information on the displays. I've included the Google API below for a quick view, but click the "View Larger Map" link on the right for a bigger display. Also note, both the map below and the map to the right are interactive. Click on a thumbtack for more info, and click-and-drag the map to look around. Man, I love the Google Map API.

View Larger Map

Paul Simon and Allen Ginsberg

2008-02-07T12:35:00.000-07:00

I love Paul Simon's writing. While a unquestionably talented guitar player, his true strength as a songsmith lies in his writing. He's still cranking out the tunes, and melding his folky, contemplative writing and playing with contemporary luminaries such as Brian Eno. I recently started listening to "The Rhythm of the Saints" the sequel to his every-possible-away-winning album "Graceland." While not as much a critical darling as Graceland, Rhythm showcases some of the most profound lyrics Simon has written.

For your consideration, the lyrics to the climatic song "Cool, Cool River." The song always reminds me of Ginsberg's epic beat poem "Howl."

"Cool, Cool River" by Paul Simon
"Moves like a fist through the traffic
Anger and no one can heal it
Shoves a little bump into the momentum
Its just a little lump
But you feel it
In the creases and the shadows
With a rattling deep emotion
The cool, cool river
Sweeps the wild, white ocean

Yes boss. the government handshake
Yes boss. the crusher of language
Yes boss. mr. stillwater,
The face at the edge of the banquet
The cool, the cool river
The cool, the cool river

I believe in the future
I may live in my car
My radio tuned to
The voice of a star
Song dogs barking at the break of dawn
Lightning pushes the edge of a thunderstorm
And these old hopes and fears
Still at my side

Anger and no one can heal it
Slides through the metal detector
Lives like a mole in a motel
A slide in a slide projector
The cool, cool river
Sweeps the wild, white ocean
The rage of love turns inward
To prayers of devotion
And these prayers are
The constant road across the wilderness
These prayers are
These prayers are the memory of god
The memory of god

And I believe in the future
We shall suffer no more
Maybe not in my lifetime
But in yours I feel sure
Song dogs barking at the break of dawn
Lightning pushes the edges of a thunderstorm
And these streets
Quiet as a sleeping army
Send their battered dreams to heaven, to heaven
For the mothers restless son
Who is a witness to, who is a warrior
Who denies his urge to break and run

Who says: hard times?
Im used to them
The speeding planet burns
Im used to that
My lifes so common it disappears
And sometimes even music
Cannot substitute for tears"

Sample of "Howl" by Allen Ginsberg
"I saw the best minds of my generation destroyed by madness, starving hysterical naked,dragging themselves through the negro streets at dawn looking for an angry fix;Angel-headed hipsters burning for the ancient heavenly connection
to the starry dynamo in the machinery of night."

Cheese Pants!

2008-02-05T14:03:00.000-07:00

(Nikki (AKA Cheese Pants) after being in her cage for 6 hours)

(Nikki, five minute later. We think she's crazy.)

Sunday dinner...

2008-02-04T08:08:00.001-07:00

The last few weeks Matt has been traveling Monday - Thursday, which allows him to be home the entire weekend. We decided at the beginning of January to have Sunday where we could both help make dinner together. This allows us to spend time together as well as have something to look forward to the week as we are apart. It has been going fabulously! (The only difference of yesterday is that he doesn't have to leave this week)

This week we created a new chicken roulade sauce involving: tomatoes with green chilies, a little mayo, ginger and garlic paste, and a smidge of soy. We filled the chicken with green onions, mushrooms, and green peppers. Matt made spatzles (or wormels - ask him if you have questions) and I made crowned cauliflower.

Yummy!

Nothing tops off a great dinner than watching a bit of MythBusters. Although a very relaxing weekend it looks like they are a bit tired, huh?

WinDirStat - Most Useful Windows Space Analyzer

2008-02-01T18:17:00.000-07:00

Here is a link to the most useful hard drive space analyzer I have ever come across. While it does make my geek bones tingle, it's not just for computer geeky-types. It's also useful for video editors, graphic designers, and sys-admins. Okay... it is for geek types, but it's so useful I just had to shout it on high from the mountain tops.

What it does is analyze your hard drive and give you a very simple view of your directory structure based on how much data is stored in that director as a percentage of your overall hard drive usage.

The upshot is once you have run it, you can easily tell what files and directories are taking up the most space on your hard drive, and easily drill down to those directories and do some house keeping. It's great for finding out where you can free up some space on your hard drive.

This utility will likely become less and less important as hard drive space increases seem to be out-pacing software space requirements.

Oh, it's also open-source, so you can hack to it your heart's delight and have it do what not with your files. I love it!

The web page for the Util: http://windirstat.info/

Minneapolis Is Cold

2008-01-31T16:45:00.001-07:00

It is really cold here, uh-huh.
-Matt

Leaving your city: A Guide

2008-01-26T14:21:00.000-07:00

So, you want to leave your city, quit your job, and start a new life under the sea? It is possible! Everything except for the living-under-the-sea part has a chance of success, and even that is possible if you have gills and/or a ton of money to spend on some kind of underwater research station a la Sealab 2021 (and fortitude!)! Don’t fret! I’ve moved more times than most people have drunk 12oz cans of Pepsi purchased from vending machines for the reasonable price of $1.25!!!

This guide should help you in this endeavor. If you don’t find what you’re looking for or have any questions that weren’t answered, feel free to read it again. All of the answers are here; you just need to be brave enough to look for them more than once.

What you will find herein is a blog-i-fied version of my much longer tome, “Kickin’ The Habit! How I Learned To Leave, and Love Leavin’ Behind” and can be found at any respectable bookstore. Respectability is easily testable. Walk into a book store, ask for my book by name, if they don’t direct you to an enormous display of the books, kick their teeth in. If you have asked via email to some book-selling-web-site like Amazon (who doesn’t have any teeth) kick your own teeth in. Then take a picture of your gums and send it to me.

To leave your city, you need motivation, a plan of action, and the all-important ability to grow a pair and "Buy the tickets, already!"

Motivation:
The first thing you'll need to leave your city is a reason. Do you absolutely love the city you live in? If so, moving may not be the best option for you. If, on the other hand, you're not very fond of your city, job, family, or the smell of the paper factory down the street, moving could be a good thing.

Motivation isn't that difficult to come up with. People tend to hate everything from time to time. The question isn't "Do I hate it here right now?" The real question is, "If I were to rate every day on a scale from 1 to 10, with 1 being absolutely loathing hatred of the city and 10 being the feeling you get when you want to make wild, passionate love to your city, and add them up then divide by the number of days I've just added up I would arrive at a Motivation score. If the score is lower than 9.5, it's time for me to move!" Do that.

Plan of Action:
If you want to not do something, and you have the ability to not do it because of some excuse, you will never do it. The reason? Excuses are really easy to make up. Don't want to mow the yard and a simple excuse will allow you to skip the chore? Easy! Just say, "Lawn mowers make me anxious and grass is green... I don't like green." BAM! You don't have to mow the yard.

Let's say your house is on fire and you have a healthy, well-developed sense of self preservation. You couldn't really come up with an excuse to not get out of bed and leave the house. The fire would force you to do something: Leave, whilst flailing your arms about your body in a vain attempt to put out flaming head.

To leave your city, you need to burn it to the ground (metaphorically). You need to put yourself in a position where an excuse will have no effect on your leaving. Quit your job. Sell your house. Write to everyone you know and tell them you are leaving, and if you don't, they all get a chance to kick your teeth in. And don't just quit your job, find another one somewhere else with a starting date that you have to be there for. Put a deposit on an apartment in another city. Things will, in a sense, force you to leave. The only trick is forgetting that you willingly set the plan in motion, that way you can feel a victim of circumstance. And if people say, "What the hell did you just do, Trey?" You can say, "I have to." Ding!

Grow a pair:
Self-explanatory. If you're lost: Watch the following video

"Buy the tickets, already!"
This is an old saying that harkens back to my traveling days of yore. Whenever I was planning a trip with friends, we would always say "Buy the tickets!" Which basically meant, once you've bought the tickets, you're going. When we would plan to do something a few months out, if there was a way to buy a plane ticket or concert ticket or whatever, we would do it because it meant we had a fixed day in the future when we would be doing something.

My advice is to buy the tickets, already. Set an actual timetable with real dates and goals. Buy the ticket to fly to the place you're interested in moving to. Make plans with friends to visit the place. Look at events going on in the new city when you'll be living there and buy tickets to them. Etc.

If none of this helps, wait for the next installment, "Kicking your teeth in: A beginner's guide"

The science of cooking?

2008-01-23T22:12:00.000-07:00

I am tired, so this will be short. Earlier this week I found this article on Discover and it totally blew my mind with strange possibilities so I thought I would pass it onto all of you too.

All I have to say is fried mayonnaise. It sounds gross, but what other ideas will they come up with?!?!?1

Dolphins Blowing Air Rings Underwater

2008-01-17T17:02:00.000-07:00

(Possibly the most beautiful video clip I have ever stumbled across...)

It was love at first lick......

2008-01-13T18:41:00.000-07:00

The sun may rise in the East, at least, it settles in a final location...

2008-01-04T14:09:00.001-07:00

It's Californication...

The holidays went by in a flash, and we're back to the grind. My grind is the traveling variety and Mandy's is the testing variety. With the help (and by help, I mean doing-all-of-the-work) of Mandy's parents, we were able to accomplish quite a bit over the holiday. The kitchen and bathrooms have been painted, the gate in the back is working again, and we have all sorts of organizing and decorating paraphernalia to adorn the house. They have made it back to Grand Rapids, and we extend our love and thanks for their visit. It was great to spend time with family over the holidays, even if the majority of the family is far away.

A few quick updates:
1. The running club is still on. We've brainstormed a few names for it, and since we haven't gotten any responses from the name email Mandy sent out, we're going to name it ourselves. So there.

2. Nikki, the newest and only dog-member of the household is doing well. She is a bit melancholy due to Mandy's parents leaving, but she's doing better day by day. Mandy is looking into some training options for her, and we'll hopefully be implementing those before too long. The trick with the training is it's mostly for the owners, not the dog. So, it's highly recommended everyone who will be participating in the training of the dog attend the classes. The problem is, I never know what days I'm going to be in or out of town, so it's impossible for me be sure to attend all the classes.

3. I'm off to California this week (I'm in Santa Monica right now) and will be in DC next week. There are also possible visits to NASA, South Carolina, and some military installation in Minnesota on the horizon. I'll be fluttering here and there, but always reachable by email and cell.

4. The cats are adjusting better than we expected to the arrival of Nikki. They seem to be pretty intent on being friends, and Niki wants to play with them all the time, but whenever they run or do anything quickly, Niki takes that as a cue to jump around and chase them, which freaks them out, and hostility quickly escalates.

That's about it from us. Things have ramped back up to full steam, and the holidays are receding quickly into the past. I can't believe Christmas and New Years has come and gone already. It's so crazy.

"They were conducting a surprise killing attack on everybody."

2007-12-31T16:38:00.000-07:00

So, it's a new year. 2008. Two years from 2010 (the year, not the movie) and we are no closer to robotic slaves, Matrix-like brain interfaces, or immortality through through some scientific means. I was brought up to believe the future would be one thing, and one thing only: Great. It wasn't my parents that put this thought into my head, it was the television shows I watched, the books I read, the highway billboards I drove past. The media, in general is responsible for this belief in the future.

To be fair to the future, robotic slaves and flying cars might be just around the corner. Or, as is the case with many discoveries, these things already exist, I just don't know about them yet. It could even be that they are really common, and I'm so completely out of the loop that I didn't realize my maid has shiny-metal robotic arms it uses to squeeze my morning glass of OJ. Could be...

I predict this year will be more of the same, and not in a bad way. There will be wars, famine, and pestilence. There will be previously undreamt-of scientific discoveries, more Wii games released, and the invention of inflatable planets we will all begin to live on with our robotic assistants and robotic taxi-drivers.

What I'm really trying to say is, I want a robot already.

(that's me on the left)

It also turns out that Colorado is in for a bad year, what with painted goons conducting an attack. And not just any attack, mind you. A killing attack. Via Coasttocoastam.com:

"After the 9-11 Tragedy, approximately 2002, I had an incredibly frightening dream. ... I was in my home with other people, it was night and dark outside, our lights were on in the house. I heard repetitive explosion like noises outside in the distance. I looked out the window to the west and could see fire and smoke in the sky coming from Boulder. The noise and fires continued and were quickly coming our way, some just at end of my block. We shut the lights off and I heard a voice in my head say "beware of the shadows, be careful of the shadows." I saw the grass moving outside and houses being set on fire, in the darkness soldiers were moving with weapons and grenades, war paint, or dark camouflage paint on their faces, others wore gas masks. They were conducting a surprise killing attack on everybody. I was terrified and thought of hiding in the attic, but knew I would be burned. I thought further of crawling into the grass to hide, but I had seen them shine lights on the grass and destroy anyone found. I knew it was the end for us. I heard them say they were the "peacekeepers.""
--Kathy

The line I can't get over is, "They were conducting a surprise killing attack on everybody." It's just so silly. This highlights my potential big problem with 2008; fear. This quote from the poor poster "Kathy" is a great view into the mass-consciousness in America. Her writing style attempts convery scientific detachment, but it's really a scene from any number of B action movies playing out in her imagination, superimposed over the ideological topography of an idealized American take-over scenario metaphysical-jumble-terror-reexamination-plughead Robot! The subject is contextualized into a mode that includes narrativity as a reality. Therefore, the premise of cultural nihilism suggests that the law is part of the collapse of consciousness, but only if David Hasselhoff is a robot; otherwise, narrativity is capable of significance of Kathy's insane ramblings... like mine. Ugh.

Pyscho-babble will be on the rise.

It was 8 years ago I was in Key West celebrating New Years with fellow globe-trotting chum Jon. We slept on a Grayhound bus two nights in a row and rode for 50 hours to get there. When we arrived, we had no place to stay, so we slept on the beach, hoping the cops wouldn't arrest us, which was possible (and likely). When the conch shell dropped from the roof of "Joe's" at the stroke of midnight, the streets exploded into a massive city-wide party of epic proportions that lasted well into the night.

When some people we met dropped us off near the Grayhound station the night before we left, we still had no place to stay, so we slept in what we thought was a ditch. Late that night, a truck came roaring the down the 2-track lane we were sleeping and missed running us over by about 10 feet. We found a white chair in the woods and set it in front of us, hoping any other truckers, out tearing up the 2-track at 3 in the morning, would see it and swerve to miss it. Why we didn't just move out of the road, is still a mystery. Come to think of it, it was probably because we had another 50 hour Grayhound bus ride in front of us and we were hoping for the quick, merciful release that being crushed under a truck would bring.

Dog Revalations and Car is Still Dead!

2007-12-26T11:01:00.001-07:00

The car is way dead, it turns out. Transmission blown. Poof. Like that. Sadly, this comes only about a month after we dropped $1,300 on a new timing belt, spark plugs, and a belt tensioner. The cost will be somewhere in the vicinity of $1,000 to fix the transmission, and that's with the used-parts kit. The suck of all sucks with this is, right now the car is worth nothing*. If we drop another thousand dollars into it, it may run for another 30,000 miles... or we may blow a rod the week after the repairs are complete. If we do end up sinking the money into the car, we can at least recoup the cost of the repairs and a little more (hopefully). This should give us enough time to have a functioning car that will allow us to drive around and look for another car, then sell this car, and buy another. Bleh.

Did I mention my not liking cars? No? Well, truth be told, I don't like cars.

On a lighter note, the voting for the crazy fact about one of the many dogs Mandy watches is closed. It seems that the readers are going with the patriotic, 9/11 people-saving dog.

DOG!

The truth is, the dog is a Thompson, of the Hunter S. variety. Yes, Bodi's owner is the ex-wife of Hunter. Hunter's son, he keeps his dog at the day car too. I hear ego-Googling is up, so it's likely that these people will come across this blog and find out the secret identity of their dog is now in the requisite domain of the interweb tubes where any Hunter-obsessed sicko can find it. Sadly, these are the times we live in. I don't get a chance to interact with many bona fide celebrities, let alone their dogs, so I hope you'll grant me leave to indulge in this particular instance.

Hunter's dog! I don't love the man. I've never met him. And from what I understand, he was an absolute bastard to interact with in real life. That makes sense, considering how crazy and reckless his writing is. On the other hand, being a bastard and a being a good writer seem to go hand-in-hand. What I can say is I like his writing. He was a great social mover and shaker. Like me, he hated hippies and the laziness they embodied.

*Update: It actually is going to cost $1,500, and we've decided to go ahead with it. I'm not totally sure why, but there it is. Again, hopefully, this will be the last major repair on it for a year or so, and we can continue to drive it. If it bothers us, we will sell it and hopefully break even with these repairs. The transmission is totally gone. Nothing salvageable. It should be done today, so when we get it back, I will post about how it drives like it always had, except a little faster due to the lightness of our wallet. Bleh.

(It's so satisying watching cars crash. Crash cars, crash!)