United Airlines Sucks

I am now getting close to entering my third hour of waiting on a plane. The cause? A 'slide' is missing. No one seems to know what this means, but here we sit nonetheless. The best part is I won't get to my hotel before 1AM at the earliest, and I have to work at 7AM EST. Woot.

I better get some frequent-flier points or something for this.

Reckless Abandon

It's hard to come across any true absurdest humor. Adding something strange to a setting does not make it absurd, it just makes it silly. It's hard to see that perfect balance of something odd, not repeated somewhere else, and accessible. Behold: A funny video...



Damn. Five minutes after posting the above video, I found another by these guys. They're called "Waverly Films" and they're amazing. It reminds of me of some videos me and some friends made in high school and after. We always had a deep appreciation for good absurdist humor. One of our earliest (in my opinion funniest) videos was an interviewer asking a man it it was true that he couldn't stand having nickels next to his ears. The interviewee says, "Yes." Smiles and winks. The skit ends with a shot of the interviewee staring at the camera and two nickles appearing next to his head. He gasps and the screen goes blank. I love it to this day... and if anyone reads this blog and still has this video accessable, I am kindly requesting that they upload it on YouTube or something so I can embed it here for the dropmystraw audience (all three of you).

I especially enjoy absurdist humor that has a twinge of maliciousness running through it. Think of a band like Ween. They are very talented musicians, and enjoyment of the music comes not only from the melodies and rhythm, but also the humor. And the humor itself is profoundly absurdist, and profoundly creepy. A great example is the song "Spinal Meningitis," wherein the band sings about a child who has spinal meningitis and is asking if he's going to, "see God." The enjoyment comes from it being so absurd and evil and well performed. It's a strange combination that many people don't seem to get into, but I love it. Here's the great example from these "Waverly Film" peeps. Enjoy.

Tomorrow's the run

We are Jess and Mike's house getting ready for the Riverbank Run tomorrow. The shirts have arrived (and no one has collected theirs except Chad and Megan). We're all stoked and ready to go down and chill with the masses. I am going to bring my camera with me and take pictures as we talk. I'll post them on the Flickr stream when time allows.

Hello, Mr. DJ?

(Pardon me, but can you tell how to get to the Soviet embassy ...?)

UK pictures and other miscellaneous items of potential interest

After many problems with our crappy Mac uploader "JetPhoto Studio", we've finally gotten our good UK pictures up on Flickr. The Flickr slideshow stream on the right-hand navigation bar should be showing the last 10-15 photos we uploaded. I am still in process of naming and organizing all the pictures into their respective sets and collections, so if you check them out right away, they won't be named or have any hilarious notes written on them. We will create a set of our top ten favorite pictures from the collection once they are all organized. I'll post about it later, when we've assembled the set.

I am still in partial-recovery mode from the knee surgery last Friday. My pain meds have run out, so it's back to the grind (literally) as I work on getting my knee up to snuff for the 5K walk in a little over a week. I have an official go-ahead from my doc, so I'm not really worried about blowing the knee up right after having it worked on. There is lingering surgery pain, but the chronic pain that I had been dealing with for the past few years seems to have abated some. That, and the horrendous grinding/snapping sounds that would accompany any lateral movement of my calf have also greatly diminished. So far I have to say I'm very pleased with the outcome.

Now that I've had a few days off for medical leave, I've been able to get a some things done that have been piling up due to me being out of the state on business and plain, old procrastination. I now have an official Colorado license, I am registered to vote, washed, vacuumed, and got an oil change for the car, and have two new pairs of glasses on order. The last thing I really should do with this semi-free time is go in for a teeth cleaning. I dread this as I'm pretty sure I have a cavity that needs filling, and we have no dental insurance. Alas. Might as well get it done before they all fall out.

Nikki has been having doggy-seizures. We've always been kind of suspicious that when she stares off into the distance and her head begins to shake (like a palsy, not a foaming, rabid grand mal kind of thing), it might be a seizure. She has been having them more frequently (she had a good 5-minute one this morning), so we decided to set up an appointment with our vet to get some tests run and try out some anti-seizure medication. Another clinching thing is that Nikki is having many of the side-effects from seizures on dogs are prone to. She looses her appetite before having one (she refused to eat breakfast and even treats this morning - just before having a seizure). She'll also get restless and won't sleep. Hopefully we'll know more tomorrow when her appointment is done.

That's about it from here. We're heading out to GR next week Thursday and will be sticking around until Sunday at the earliest. I have work at the Smithsonian in DC and in Minneapolis starting that Monday, so I don't know if I'll leaving Sunday night late, or Monday morning early.

(I want one very badly.)

Surgery, Travel, and Bacon

Just got my kneecap scraped by a steady-handed surgeon here in Denver. This was done to correct issues lingering from my heroic knee-injury of nearly ten years past. I was put under general anesthetic (totally knocked out) then scraped, and awoken with a video of the procedure in hand. I have included that video below for those of you who want to see a shredded knee from the inside, and how it is shaved and cleaned up. I think it's pretty cool.

(Inner-space)

I recieved a present for my impending birthday last night: four pounds of Father's Bacon. Father's Bacon! Father's is the Roles Royce of the bacon underground. It's cured so perfectly, that no refridgeration is needed. It is considered by many the greatest bacon made. I have a long-standing discussion with Mandy's dad about my love for bacon and how I really want to smoke my own this summer (I have already bought the smoker), and how I should buy him a bacon-of-the-month subscription. It seems he and Sue beat me to the punch with this delivery. So, tomorrow, to celebrate my birthday, I will stay laid up on the couch and eat me some bacon.

(I call this "Knee Injury with Bacon, Cookies, Pain Medication, and Dog")

We are still planning to be back in Grand Rapids over the weekend of the 10th of May for the River Bank Run. Depending on how that knee heals and becomes stable, I am planning to do the walk. The Torpedo Monkey t-shirts have already arrived at Mandy's parent's house and are ready to be picked up. We'll be sending more out about what we're planning to do before and after the room, so keep checking the Torpedo Monkey blog for more info.

Too much Torpedo Monkey!

Amen, mama

This editorial restores some of my faith in humanity. It's about a mother who (gasp!) let her 9-year-old child ride (gasp!) the subway by themselves. In... NEW YORK! (isn't that where the terrorists go?). And despite the raging horrors that lie in wait for every child who isn't tagged with a cell phone, bicycle helmet, or a private investigator trailing their every movement, the child actually made it home in one piece.

It's very refreshing to see this one example of a calm, reasoned response to the ridiculous amount misplaced fear inflicting our culture. The only thing that would be better is if this didn't illicit a blog response due to its extreme rarity. It wish it were a common thing that people take a second to consider the real difference between the percieved and actual threats lying in wait for them and their children.

Read the whole thing, it's great.

Link to article.

Cool Idea....

While reading the news on the BBC website I ran across this article. It seems there is a new automated restaurant in Germany where customers order their food via a touch screen and then they receive their food from a machine which looks like a roller coaster.

I don't think this will take over all of our restaurants, but it is a really cool idea.

I want to eat there!

Back in the States

We made it back safe and sound. Well, safe at any rate. We're still decompressing from the flights and jet-lag. Mandy's back to the testing grind and I'm off to NASA for a couple days, so it's business as usual around here.

I am going to recount the trip in some kind of blog form as time permits. We have gigs and gigs of images to organize, name, and arrange in sets and collections. Our two traveling companions Dean and Erin also took gobs of pics that they have started to upload to Flickr. In fact, we used their TomTom GPS satellite navigation gadget to get us around the country, and there is a feature that should let Dean upload our driving routes to Google maps. We're also going to organize a top ten list of pics for those of you (like me) who don't want to rummage through 200 pages of pictures without any kind of context.

All of this should be coming within the next couple weeks as, again, time permits.

I think the twitter thing was pretty cool. I would've kept it more up-to-date as I traveled, but I had a horrible time getting my phone to work with the UK cell system and I am lazy. I'm going to try it again with this trip to NASA to see if I will be any better at it in the states. If not, I'm going to drop it from the right-hand nav. I only want to keep things there that I have an intention of keeping updated.

I've been listening to the new Gnarls Barkley CD. The first time I heard it, I wasn't impressed. I listened again, and was still not that impressed. But the third time... the third time is a charm. It also may have been the first time I listened to it, it was through a FM transmitter built into the GPS, playing out of the car stereo speakers while I drove around the UK, for the first time, on the wrong side of the road. The second time was through a pair of noise-canceling headphones, on a 747, floating over the middle of the Atlantic ocean, bonked out of my head on jet lag and stress. This morning I listened, uninterrupted, through my new reciever, and it totally changed my mind on it. Anyway, here's a video from it.

Meet me on the other side of the world

Remember, remember the Fifth of November,
The Gunpowder Treason and Plot,
I know of no reason
Why Gunpowder Treason
Should ever be forgot.

Last night in the UK. We're flying out on the BA0297 to Chicago with a quick two hour jump Denver and into the waiting paws of a slobbering doggy and two very pissed off cats. I can't wait. I've been out of the country for half a month now, and a week of that was spent working (fun though it was, it's still work).

The trip has been great fun. We saw a sizable chunk of the Greatest of Britians, but now it's time to return to ole' Stars and Stripes, home of the boogie-board sized steak and magical, ever-descending dollar.

(HDR Image we took of Bodiam Castle)

London Heathrow Airport Crazyness

From a Bloomberg Press article titled, "Heathrow T5 Opening `Chaotic'"

March 27 (Bloomberg) -- London Heathrow airport's 4.3 billion-pound ($8.6 billion) fifth terminal canceled flights after the baggage system broke down on the first day of operations, prompting passengers to brand the opening ``chaotic.''

As many as 68 inbound and outbound flights were scrapped by British Airways Plc, the terminal's sole occupant. Baggage check- in was halted while Heathrow owner BAA Ltd. worked to resolve ``operational issues'' and the airline said in a statement passengers should fly with hand luggage only, rebook for another day or claim a refund."

Guess which airline, airport, and terminal Mandy is flying into this morning...

There's a hole in the world, like a big black pit...

And it's filled with people that are filled with shit.
And all the vermin of the world inhabit it.
And it's called... London."
-Sweeny Todd

So, I'm off across the pond yet again. Only, this time it will end with my friends Dean and Erin and my beloved Mandy joining me in the Big Smoke, where we will spend a week touring Scottland and the eastern coast of England.

Rather than put random postings on the blog, I am going to try something new this time around. I am going to maintain a Twitter feed at the behest of my friend Josh. To use this feature, you will need to subscribe to the Twitter RSS feed. This is really, really simple. It's so simple, in fact, that I have already added the RSS feed to the right-hand nav on the Blog (where it reads "Matt's Twitter Feed" and everytime you refresh the page, if I have added something new, you will see it). If you would like to subscribe, simple click this link LINK. Then, on your browser of choice, click the Subscribe Now button, and the feed will be added to your bookmarks. Then, to follow our progress around the globe, you simple have to check the feed and you'll see. If you have any problems getting this to work, either post a comment or email me and I'll step you through it.

I am heading over to the UK to attend the Immersive Cinema conference, an amazing conglomeration of the visionaries guiding the dome, curved-wall, and virtual reality crowd. The web-page for the conference can be found here, and the itinerary of amazing speakers can be found here. I know four of the people giving talks, and one of them, Mr. Dan Neafus, is giving the keynote speech on the last day on of the con. I am bringing my beautiful Canon XTi with me, so I will be posting and live-blogging as much of the conference as I am able to attend.

Either way: I'm off! And soon, so is Mandy, Dean, and Erin to explore the Ole' Country 'Cross the Pond. Love and well-wishes to the lot of ya'!

(Starballs are sweet!)

The Tongue

"It can't be bargained with! It can't be reasoned with! The tongue doesn't know pity, or remorse, or fear... and it absolutely will not stop, ever, until you are licked!"
-The Terminator

BBC Again - This time with alien birds

Mandy and I watched this at home and laughed so hard we had to see if the clip was floating out here somewhere. Guess what! It was!

(What planet is are these birds from?)

The BBC and the co.

The company I work for has recently been showcased by the BBC. Being a company based out of the UK, it makes sense. It's also because we recently installed the projection, audio, and real-time space simulation system at the largest digital dome in the UK.

Since the BBC is made up of boogers, I can't embed the video in the blog, so you'll have to follow this link to see the videos of my boss and co. talking about how super-sweet our presentation solution is. We rock!

Here's a more detailed article on the technology we use, with specific emphasis on the projectors we use. Sadly, I have note been able to convince them to give me one as a bonus, but I'll wear 'em down, so says I. Aarrgghhh... (that's my pirate projector voice)

Cutest bear ever!!!

I don't know about you, but it looks like a stuffed animal to me. Her name is Flocke, which means flake in German (as in snowflake).

For more cute pics check out this website.

Here she is....

Our singing and licking doggy.....

Building Bases on the Moon! Woot!

While I am a big fan of exploration, I can't help but watch this and think of David Cross when he pretended to be a homeless man asking a lady for some money for food. She replies, "No, we don't have any money to give you for food... we're putting a robot on the moon!"

Laugh or Cry?

The headlines says it all, "Sheriff: Kansas woman sat on boyfriend's toilet for 2 years; didn't want to leave bathroom"

And

"WICHITA - Authorities are considering charges in the bizarre case of a woman who sat on her boyfriend's toilet for two years - so long that her body was stuck to the seat by the time the boyfriend finally called police.

Ness County Sheriff Bryan Whipple said it appeared the 35-year-old Ness City woman's skin had grown around the seat. She initially refused emergency medical services but was finally convinced by responders and her boyfriend that she needed to be checked out at a hospital."

I think... cry.

Link: http://www.mercurynews.com/ci_8547307?source=rss

It's been a long day coming...

Hey all,
This is the first post in a while. I'm hell-bent on posting more than last year (128), and I haven't been doing very well with that resolution.

The main cause for the delay has been sheer busyness. But, everyone's busy, so that's really not much of an excuse. My grandma died on 21st of February, and I could use my grieving as an excuse for not posting, but that's not it either. Sometimes I lose interest, and sometimes I don't. I think that's about it.

I am planning a long write-up on my grandma, my thoughts on her death, and how she's impacted my life, but this isn't that post. I need to think more on it before I post something.

I was out at NASA Ames Research Center last week and this week I'm off to Houston (to buy me some pants -Beck) then from Houston to NYC until next week Tues. Then home for four days, and I'm off to the UK for two weeks. It goes without saying that I'll be as busy as always, but it shouldn't stop me from posting and updating. I will make a conscious effort to post more over the next few weeks as I bounce from one side of the country to the other, from one side of the world to the other. I have recently updated the cool-ass Google Map on the right-hand navigation bar with my visit to NASA, and will update it as I pop around the next few weeks.

Updates:

1. As I mentioned before, my Grandma (on my father's side) died on the 21st. She wanted the funeral and visitation to be done with as soon as possible, so she died on a Thursday, the visitation was on Friday, and the funeral was on Saturday. Mandy and I literally jumped on a plane and did a crazy circuit with family and friends for the few days we were there. I will write more on this later.

2. Nikki, our dog, graduated from her Pet Smart Beginner's Training course. The cool thing is, the class has a practice exam before the real one, that way the dogs have two chances to complete the list of commands they have to obey. Nikki passed on the practice exam, a week earlier than the time normally allotted. Only her and one other dog out of a class of ten completed early. The teacher of the class told us we should run her through the rest of the classes because she's smart enough to complete them, so we're signed up for the intermediate. Hopefully she'll pass, and be as well-behaved as Mandy's sister's dog Stormy. Either way, Nikki did really well and has been adapting to her new behavior modification like a champ. She's so smart... (*Note: If this is how I talk up my dog's training, just wait until we have kids... there will be no end to it)

3. The house here in Denver is really shaping up. Thanks to all the help from Mandy's parents, we have a fully functioning set of curtains in our newly painted kitchen and an awesome fold-out spice rack on its way in the mail. Mandy painted the upstairs, and we've put in a faux-bamboo roll-up to cover the closet, and bought new office furniture. As we find places for the rest of the crap, the upstairs is finally turning into a work / living space. Our next steps are to finish the furnishing of the living room, paint that area, then start working on the master and guest bedrooms. By the time people come out to visit this Spring / Summer, we'll be mostly done decorating and organizing.

4. Work has been crazy for both of us. Mandy is hard at work pointin' out bugs in her HR software. Point of fact, the other day, she found a bug so devastating it might delay the whole product launch. Go Mandy! My work has involved lots of traveling, big displays systems, and crazy dancer / astrophysicists (it's true). I have begun my HSPD 12 security clearance process, which should take about six months. It's a security clearance I need to access NASA computer system as well as gain access to any NRL (National Research Laboratory) sites. Some of you will be getting calls from the goverment asking about my ability to handle sensitive government docs. Whatever you do, don't tell them about that time I ruled the small island-country of "Kalembesh" in the Adriatic sea.

That's about it from here. Many of these items need more info and updating, I realize. I will be doing my best to fill in the gaps of these past few weeks, and will work harder on putting up more content.

Thanks for tuning in!